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This is the end. My foolish friends, the end.

All The Time In The World (2) - Sloane shoots Jack,and Sydney shoots Sloane, but he's already discovered eternal life, so that doesn't really have much effect on him. Irina's behind the whole kit and caboodle,and this entire series wraps up with us thinking that five years and trillions of Rambaldi references have lead to nothing more than immortality and a bitchy power-hungry mother. It all ends reasonably well with Jack sacrificing himself to remove Sloane from humanity and the new Spy Family retiring to a little cottage on the beach. And everyone lives happily ever after.

Erin

One down, one to go

Reprisal (1) - In Part One of this series finale two-parter, we follow Sloane's actions as he kidnaps Marshall and Rachel, travels to an ice chamber below Mount Subasio, and discovers just what Rambaldi meant by "sky" in his prophecy. In case you were wondering, it has nothing to do with that stuff up above your head with fluffy clouds rolling around in it. Oh, and Sydney falls down a crevasse and is dead. Yeah, because you haven't SEEN the next episode.

Erin

A rose by any other name, would look like a creepy old guy.

No Hard Feelings - Syd pretends to be Anna pretending to be Syd and heads off for some prison that used to be a monastery in an effort to retrieve something called The Rose. All she winds up doing is getting an amulet that Sloane quickly steals. It's all leading to Rambaldi's Greatest Mystery™ that may or may not lead to the end of the world.

Erin

A chip off the old ɉlodie

I See Dead People - A microchip with Vaughn's name etched onto it is discovered in dead ɉlodie's body, forcing Syd and Jack to contact Vaughn in the distant reaches of Nepalbhutansomeplacewithyaks. SydAnna gets there first, however, and digs a matching chip out of Vaughn's naked chest, leading them to a bunker in Germany. It all ends with SydAnna's death and the reappearance of Hot!Sark! So...all's well that ends well?

Erin

Daddies with glass tables shouldn't throw daughters.

30 Seconds - Sloane resurrects Nadia with a Rambaldi cure, only to accidentally kill her a day or so later when she comes between him and his precious Rambaldi. Élodie's dead too, courtesy of SydAnna, who is one cold-hearted bitch of a killer. Rambaldi's endgame seems to be moving closer, as Sloane joins forces with Prophet Five and finally embraces his inner evil.

Erin

Two Sydneys for the price of one.

There's Only One Sydney Bristow - In the bargain basement deal of the century, Peyton recruits Anna into Prophet Five--and gets another Sydney in the process! Thaaaat's right: Anna gets cloned into Sydney. And Will? Well, Will shows up just long enough to make us remember how much we miss him.

Erin

Happy Mother's Day, bitch.

Maternal Instinct - Irina shows up, tells Syd that she never wanted to be a mother in the first place and...kind of hates being one, delivers Syd's baby, and then skedaddles out of town with The Horizon firmly in her possession. No Mother's Day card for her! She also says that she gave the order to have Vaughn shot, but since he's alive and well and living in Bhutan, it doesn't really matter.

Erin

"So when you're near me, darling can't you hear me, S.O.S.!"

S.O.S. - Sing it, Abba! Sing louder -- Syd can't hear you because she's trapped on a boat in the middle of the ocean, and there's something wrong with the Spy Fetus. Hey, maybe if you sing "Dancing Queen," we won't notice the boring B-story with Getty and some guy he's looking for called "The Cardinal." But sing the extended disco version, because the less we hear of "The Cardinal" the better.

Erin

Electric (Stick of Honesty) Dreams

The Horizon - Syd's kidnapped and drugged and zapped periodically with an electric shock stick, all so that she'll remember some name that is the location of something called "The Horizon." What this is, we don't find out. But we do discover that Prophet Five has possibly nefarious plans for the Spy Fetus, and that Syd is in the middle of an ocean with no land anywhere in sight. Oh, and Irina Derevko's behind it all. That's important, right?

Erin

Rachel went to São Paulo and all we got was this lousy episode.

Bob - Oh, okay, so it wasn't actually lousy. But it wasn't all that noteworthy either. Rachel goes on assignment in São Paulo and winds up doing the deed with none other than Julian Sark. It's kind of hot. Jack goes to intercept the sale of a micropulse bomb and gets kidnapped. That's not hot at all.

Erin