Pinheads

S01E02

So, we join the Wilsons for their daily "we're hectically busy but still totally wholesome" breakfast. There's banana throwing, frantic talk of English projects, and late-night school board meetings. But (sigh) you just know it would be all right without the intrusion of those worldly Hills folk! Long story short, everyone goes off their separate ways, leaving behind poor, lonely Aunt Becky as she sadly butters her toast.

At West Bev HS, Ethan approaches a cold Naomi. He calls her out, and she plasters on her bravest former Painted Baby smile and asks him what's up. He mumbles that he wonders how she's doing. She gives him the "Fuck off, I'm fine" speech she practiced in the mirror, like, 400 times that morning, rubbing it in his face that she's going to Vegas to see Coldplay that night. She punctuates this point by slamming her locker and swirling her curls in pivot-stomp off to class. Know what would have made this scene better? Polka-dot leggings.

Kelly gives tardy Silver a little sister-as-Guidance-Counselor ribbing and notes that Silver looks rundown. Silver snarks that post-rehab chic is the new look. Kelly counters that brushing one's hair is always in style. Silver heads off to class, passing Mr. Matthews. He makes a beeline to flirt with Kelly, finally making a positively Casanovan segue into asking Kelly on a (second) dinner date.

In the cafeteria, Navid (whom I had already totally forgotten was even in the show) approaches the lacrosse table to invite the jocks over to watch the new Bond flick, to which his (porn) film producer dad has early access. Though they're more interested Navid's MILF mom than him, the guys accept. You know what would have improved this scene? Porkpie hats and vests over t-shirts.

Elsewhere, Annie runs into her new theater boyfriend, Ty. He asks if her parents are still irked that he whisked her off Pretty Woman-style to San Francisco for a school-night dinner date, then invites her to check out a band the night. She practically wets her pants with excitement, as you do, while accepting his offer.

Lorenzo and Aunt Becky reconvene at Casa Wilson. Aunt Becky chagrins that the family already doesn't have time for one another anymore. They're losing their Midwestern values, you get it? But she has a plan. Segue to the teens reacting exactly how you'd expect them to at the suggestion of spending Friday night with their parents instead of, say, with their ridiculously rich new boyfriend or their porn-heir friend. For their part, Lorenzo and Becky are just as shocked as you expect them to be that it's not their kids idea of heaven to spend a weekend night bowling. Lorenzo gets all Beverly Hillbillies, saying they need to "bring a little Kansas to Beverly Hills."