By DeAnn Welker
Previously: Trump sent Jesse to work with KOTU. On Athena, Melissa felt like Brande and Annie were ganging up on her, because ... they were. Jesse hated Clint, and called him stupid. But Clint and KOTU won in the boardroom, and Annie and Brande both wanted Melissa fired. Trump agreed, and Melissa went nutso. Joan jumped to her defense, and then walked off with her. We end the previouslies with Melissa saying "Lying [bleep] whores," but it almost sounds like "horse," and then we cut to a horse and carriage in Central Park. Nice one, show.
Brande and Annie are still amazed at what just happened. They think tomorrow's going to be ugly. Brande asks the camera if she's such a dumb blonde, why is she still here and Melissa gone. (Um, because the person making the decisions is obsessed with Playmates?) Brande thinks Melissa is a dumb brunette. Yeah, that just doesn't sound as insulting. Brande wonders if Joan's coming back, and Jesse sulks that she's not. Annie and Brande talk about how personal Joan and Melissa make everything. Jesse sits and smiles as he texts someone. Brande really hopes Joan comes back, because she would love to beat her in this game. All of a sudden, Brande wants to win. She says, "Game on." And then our "Money, money, money" song starts. Man, I miss the simple annoyances of Tom Green and Scott Hamilton.
Clint gets to give money to his charity, in case we had forgotten this show actually has a positive element (I sort of had). His charity is International Rett Syndrome Foundation. He gets emotional in front of a fancy phone as his voiceover tells us Rett Syndrome is a disease that killed his niece. He calls his brother, Kevin Black, who's actually just outside the door, hiding from Clint. He walks inside, and they hug. Clint says he's been missing family. Clint explains that he won the task, so he didn't get fired, and the really good news is his $20,000 check for the foundation. Kevin gets emotional as Clint explains that Kevin's daughter was diagnosed when she was two and died when she was sixteen. Kevin gets choked up as he says this money might help find a cure. They hug. It's very touching, but let's move back to the drama, shall we?
Brande, Anne, Jesse, and Clint line up outside the boardroom to find out what their task is. Joan's not there. Everyone wonders if she's coming back, except Jesse, who doesn't think she is. Then we get dramatic music as the elevator opens and Joan walks in. She says her taxi was late, and Trump asks how she is. She says fine, and he calls her a pro. Joan tells us that her team shouldn't suffer because of something personal, so she came back to win. Trump says it's not easy for her, because if someone did something to Ivanka or Don ... well, he gets it. Annie's not surprised Joan's back, because she thinks Joan is full of shit. She says there's a reason Joan got fired from the TV Guide Channel: because she's a complete bitch. On to the task: Today they'll be working with one of Trump's favorite brands, Chicken of the Sea. Why do I not believe that's true? He says it's one of the largest seafood companies in the world. They're working with executives John and Mike, who introduce the task. They've had the same jingle for fifty years, and would like the teams to write them a new one. Brande and Annie start whispering about how KOTU has Clint, and then Brande interviews that they can't compete with a Grammy winner. She finishes strong: "Holy S-R-A-P." She does catch herself and correct her spelling of crap, but then she starts swearing about how she was going to say shit, but then she didn't. She is so not a dumb blonde, y'all. The teams must use some lyrics from the old jingle, and they also will create a thirty-second radio commercial. They'll present both tomorrow. Don and Ivanka will be Trump's eyes and ears. Brande and Annie want Clint as their project manager, but he's obviously on KOTU, so Annie will do it. Everyone on KOTU agrees Clint should be theirs, and Jesse says he likes Clint now. The winning project manager will get $20,000 for his or her charity. A loser will be fired.
Annie and Brande are frantic and stressed about this task. It's so unfair! They're on the Chicken of the Sea website doing research. They think they're going to the boardroom, but the research makes them feel better before their meeting with executives. They ask who buys this product, and are told it's mostly women with families. Three keywords to describe the product: natural, healthy, convenient. After the meeting, Annie at least felt like they can do the thirty-second spot really well. She wants it to be a conversation with moms. But she's still "Holy shit!" about the jingle. KOTU's meeting with the executives now, and asking what their bullet points would be for brand messaging. They like health and convenience, but they also like humor and fun. The executive interviews that he likes Clint more than the other team. Jesse says he and Clint have to work together, and Joan says having Clint in charge again is a lot of Clint, and she worries he won't have a funny commercial, which will piss her off.
Athena heads to the studio after their meeting. Brande and Annie have no idea how they are going to come up with a jingle because they can't sing. I guess they don't get that you don't have to sing the jingle; just write it. Brande starts singing: "What's the best tuna? Chicken of the sea. Chicken of the sea. Feed them the tuna you trust, faithfully." Annie is trying to stifle her laughter, but tells the camera later that if her musical abilities would be described as "slim," Brande's would have to be described as "none." Annie says, "We are bad," but she means that Brande is bad. Brande laughs, but thinks they were on a roll. Annie asks Brande to stop singing so she can think. Brande says it's not fair being tone deaf. Brande gets all serious as she sings the original jingle, and it's horrifying, so they both start laughing. This is not going to go well. Annie says the van ride actually helped her, because the absurdity of the situation made her realize they just have to try to have fun.
KOTU's getting out of their van to go into the studio, which Clint says was a moment of joy, because it's like his second home. At the studio, they divided the labor pretty quickly: Joan and Jesse start writing out what should go in the commercial, as Clint starts writing music. He starts jotting down brand messaging words, and playing his guitar. He starts singing, and ... well, let's just say it's better than Brande's attempt. Clint wants to put the word "naturally" at the beginning of each line, and then he sings the whole thing for his team, and both Joan and Jesse love it. Joan says it's "a magical moment." Jesse says it's catchy, too. Now all they need is a band. I bet Clint knows someone who can help with that. Athena is still struggling, and by struggling I mean writing long, uninteresting jingles: "The kids want it fast, you want it fresh. Feed them the tuna that's the best." (Doesn't rhyme, but I think Annie thinks it does.) "For the healthy choice at home or on the go, why don't you reach for the one you know?" Then the original jingle. Brande starts singing it, and Annie starts cracking up. It's really disturbing. They apparently like that so much they move on to the commercial. It's too long, so they keep cutting until they get it to thirty seconds. Brande even sings about that. Uh-oh. Who got her started?
The band is recording the jingle when Joan pulls Jesse aside and asks if he thinks it should be a little peppier. Jesse's all, "Uh..." and Joan says radio needs to be zippy. Jesse thinks they should do a slow, medium and fast take. I guess that means one of each. Joan agrees, but wants Jesse to tell Clint, which is weird. Jesse says Joan's using him as her liaison to Clint. Which is so odd after last week. Jesse asks if he wants to try one a little faster to try both, and Clint agrees and does it faster, too. Joan likes it, but Clint likes the lazier feel more. He interviews that he's evolved and gotten better at "making the team feel like I am listening," but that he still has the right to accept or reject what they come up with. He likes the slower one, and Joan's annoyed.
Don checks in on Annie and Brande, who are trying not to despair. He asks what they have that KOTU doesn't, and they think they understand the brand a lot better. Annie's a mom, so she gets it, but she thinks the jingle is going to be too important. Brande asks Don if he wants to see her in the mermaid outfit tomorrow. He proves he's his father's son by saying nothing would make him happier, and "as skimpy as possible." Clint's listening to his jingle, and Joan would like to add "Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck. Splash" at the end, but that doesn't do it for Clint. He thought it was funny and cute, but a risk they didn't need to take, since there was no way to know how executives would respond to a cartoon of their image. Ivanka comes to check in on KOTU. She likes the song, but says it's more classic, and wonders if that's what they wanted. She interviews that it will ultimately come down to whether Clint listened to what the executives were looking for. He tells Ivanka he went with something lazy that people would like to sing along with. She nods, clearly thinking he's not listening to her. And she's a Trump.
Brande and Annie are working on the commercial they wrote, which they think isn't the hard part. Brande plays a mom in the commercial, along with some voice actor. Annie interviews that Brande tends to not be a creative force, but she's pulling her into that, because she needs her to be that. Annie wants them to do it again, because it was a 34-second commercial instead. It's really pretty straight-forward and boring. KOTU's coming up with theirs, too, and Clint wants to be funny. He comes up with a concept to say "Did you know?!" followed by facts about the tuna. They have voiceover people doing it, and it actually sort of works. The bits after the "Did you know?!" rhyme, and they're sort of funny, even ("It's good for your thighs and good for your heart"). I think we have a winner, folks. Jesse and Joan aren't happy with one of their voice actors, though, so they act it out for him, but the guy still doesn't do it right so they go in the hall and decide to give the actors one more take and then just do it themselves. Jesse tries to be funny, and asks Joan, "Did you know we were going to be better?," but she doesn't get it and just says, "Yes. Yes."
Annie's singing her fresh/fast jingle to a guitar player. She's not doing great, and it seems like she's not even sure about the words. Brande tries to help her through it. Annie gives a lot of instructions to the guitar player for how little she knows. She keeps wanting him to end on high notes, and it sounds weird. She says she couldn't get this right, and she really doesn't want to fail. Their music cuts to KOTU's, which is obviously better and Clint's instructions actually make sense. Joan says there are two equal parts in this, and they need to lay down the commercial now. Jesse says they have to wait until he's ready to do it. They find the studio empty, but he comes in, so Joan asks if they can do the commercial first. They do it, in two takes, and Clint gets back to his commercial. Athena's still struggling with the music. Annie keeps singing along with her musicians, and I'm not sure why. Brande says that all of a sudden things started clicking. I guess someone could like it better than the other one, but it's really boring. Brande and Annie love it, and they think all the other people in the room do, too. Annie says that no matter what happens, she wrote an amazing song. She thinks Clint can't do that much better than this, and if they win, it will be a high point of her life. She says she loves this song, and Brande seems a little less enthusiastic.
The morning, Annie's really excited and doesn't care if they win or lose. Brande's still worried since they're going up against Clint. KOTU's coming in too. Everyone practices. Joan wants to walk past like a sign girl while he's singing, which he says they can talk about after rehearsal. She tells Jesse it's another idea rejected. She says if the first club owner she went to was Clint, she'd still be working at Wal-Mart. Wait, still?! Did she work at Wal-Mart? I feel like she pre-dates it. She says Clint shouldn't question the comedy, and if she had a car, she'd give it to Jesse. She shows Clint that she'll walk by and then say "Cluck, cluck, cluck. Splash." He wants her to just walk by and not say that stuff. So she says she's like Helen Keller, because he doesn't want to use the world's number one icon of comedy ("and also in London").
Athena presents their jingle, with Annie as presenter, obviously. They explain they have a woman singing because of the consumer base, which they're obviously using as a "NOT CLINT" selling point. Their singer comes out and sings, and the executives smile the whole time. They move on quickly to the commercial, which feels really rushed, like they should have cut some stuff out instead of just talking fast. Annie walks off the stage to the sound of her jingle. KOTU's turn. Clint comes to one mike, and introduces Clint Black. Joan walks by the with the sign. Clint sings, with a whole group of people harmonizing behind him. Then Clint introduces the commercial, which is really good. Clint feels confident and wants more money for his charity. The executives look happy. Joan thinks it would be amazing if the girls win, but she says Annie can do everything, you know, and the task should have been to walk on wire. Joan just can't pass up an opportunity to hate on Annie.
Nighttime in New York, as the teams head to the boardroom, where Don and Ivanka are waiting. Trump enters, and asks how Clint feels he did with his big advantage. Clint thinks they did well, though it's hard to know what the executives will like. Trump asks which is better, the jingle or the commercial. Clint prefaces his saying they're equal by saying they took more risks with the commercial's humor, and hopes that's what the executives will like. Trump asks how Joan feels about that, and she thinks it all was incredible. She says it was astonishing. Trump asks if Annie felt like she was at a big disadvantage, and she says she had never written a lyric or a piece of music, but since she was the least tone deaf of the two of them, she did it. Annie says they found their heart in the face of going up against Clint. They decided just to attack it. Trump asks about the other half of the task, and Annie says they did the commercial first and she thinks they did it really well, because they understood the brand and what the executives wanted. He asks which was better, and Annie says the jingle. Trump wants to hear it, and Annie wants to sing along. Wow, she's annoying. And even more so when they sing along. The Trumps don't love it, which is awesome. The commercial starts , and the Trumps don't like that either. It's just boring. Trump says it's pretty good, and Joan says it's absolutely adorable. Clint praises the jingle, saying everyone has music in them.
Jesse says it's not bad, but theirs is better. Joan says the jingle's adorable, but theirs is different, and she doesn't like straight commercials. And she still likes Clint's jingle more. Trump would like to hear it. The Trumps like it, and Annie looks sheepish. Then the "Did you know?!" starts, and it's awesome. Brande and Annie are totally impressed. Trump asks if she thinks theirs is better, and Annie says no. Brande says theirs is very, very good. Annie says it depends on what the executives want, so Trump asks Don to let us know what they said about Athena. They thought they hit the brand messaging, it was catchy and creative. They liked the moms talking, but didn't like that they didn't mention the pouches. Trump doesn't like that. He likes his tune from the can. Ivanka says that the executives loved Clint's performance of the jingle. They liked the focus on "natural," and they loved the comedy in Joan's commercial. The negatives were that they don't think everyone loves country, and they wanted more focus on the convenience of the product. Clint says that's all fair.
Trump asks if everyone's ready, and says that the executives really liked Annie and Brande better. They felt like the country of Clint was very limited. I feel like this has to be rigged, because I think that jingle would appeal to anyone. Annie cries because she felt there was no way they could win against Clint. That also seems fake. Is this show completely scripted? They hug and cry on their way out. I want to vomit. Trump tells KOTU they've all done great, but someone will be fired. After commercial, Annie and Brande are celebrating in the suite. Annie thought they had a chance when she heard it was country. She's very in love with herself now, for winning in a song-writing contest against Clint. She says she's the winningest project manager, she's never been brought into the boardroom, and she's raised 30 percent of the money in a 16-man game, so if she doesn't make the final two, it's because she pissed off Trump without knowing it. Brande's shocked and so happy. She says she's not a dumb blonde.
In the boardroom, Trump says it was quite an upset, and he tells Clint he actually liked it more but it has nothing to do with him. I sort of love him for doing that, because, duh. Stupid executives. Though he calls them "talented." Ivanka says she liked it more, so she was surprised they lost, but they mentioned the brand more. Trump says it was also zippier, and Joan agrees it had a lot of snap. But she also adds that people would sing Clint's, and you couldn't really sing the other one. Annie's pissed in the suite, saying, "People have been singing it all day, Joan!" Trump asks why they lost, and Jesse says that even though they worked together, it wasn't totally collaborative because this was Clint's show, and they couldn't argue with him. Jesse asks if Clint listened to their ideas, and Jesse says a little bit. He tells them about Clint recording a couple of faster versions, but he thinks they ended up with the slow ones. Don asks if they could have fit more into the jingle if they'd sped it up, which of course they could have. Trump asks Joan why her radio spot didn't talk about convenience. She says she wanted it to be funny, but they couldn't make it funny enough because there was no punch line. She tells them the "Cluck, cluck, cluck. Splash" thing and no one laughs.
Ivanka tells Joan that the humor was actually what they liked, but had they gone a step further, it might have been distracting to them. She says they did respond to that positively. Trump asks Joan who to fire, and she once again cannot stand this. Clint tells her to go ahead; it won't hurt his feelings. She says it would have to be the project manager. Trump says that Joan wanted more snap in the jingle and, ultimately, that might be one of the reasons he didn't win. He tells Clint he's a real talent, and he loved his jingle, but he's lost before, so Clint's fired. Clint thanks Trump for everything, and they thank him. He leaves. Brande says that has to be hard and Annie says he just got beat by a poker player who's never sung anything in her life. Joan tells them how funny the commercial could have been as she gets up. In the hall, Jesse and Joan both hug Clint. He interviews that he knew he was going when Athena won. He learned a lot about himself and his people skills, and that life's too short to be around people he doesn't enjoy.
Annie and Brande don't want Joan to come in, and they hope she doesn't. But they do. Brande says she's knows it's hard. Jesse says hi. Annie wants to be happy about final four, but Joan won't even look at her. Jesse tells them they did a good job pulling that out, and Annie's like, "I don't know how I even wrote that jingle." Joan says that any team Annie's on is spelled, "T-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-e-a-m." Hee. Annie asks if Jesse really became friends with Clint, and Jesse says it's easier to be friends than fight with him. Joan leaves the room, and Annie says it became really jovial. Jesse asks them to play checkers to prove that point. Annie calls Joan a "cancer." The phone rings, and they're all called back to the boardroom.
The four of them enter the boardroom, where Trump congratulates them and then says two more people will be fired tonight after being interviewed by Piers Morgan. He's going to recommend the final two to Trump, and Trump will very strongly rely on him. He tells them all to go. They sit in the lobby and stress out. Annie congratulates everyone on their "amazing accomplishment." But, you know, mostly herself. Joan says it was difficult to sit there, knowing only half of them would be picked. They all look nervous. Brande's called in first to see Piers. She thinks there's a lot at stake. Wow, she's so smart.
But we don't get to see the interviews. We see Trump sitting down with Piers asking how things are, intercut with interview flashbacks. In his interview with Brande (who looks like she got to freshen her makeup) he says the allegations are that she's not smart. Brande thinks that's not what was said. Piers asks if she thinks she's bright, and she says she knows she is. He says everyone likes her, but no one liked him and he won. Will being Miss Nice Guy help her win? She says no, that's just who she is. She thinks winning would be a nice bonus. He asks how she'll be "unexpendable." She says she defends herself, and will until the end. With Trump, Piers doesn't think Brande's smart enough, so Trump asks about Joan. Piers thinks she's complicated. To say the least. He thinks she's very smart, and has shown remarkable stamina for her age. When Piers interviews her, he tells her he's fascinated by how she's played this game. He says she's a survivor and has never given up, yet they think she's a quitter because of how Melissa was treated. She says, "Oh, yeah, I'm a real quitter." He asks who she is to be the second arbiter of fairness, and she says she has her principles, which are "family first," and that they're a very small family. Piers asks if Joan's problem with Annie is that she thinks she's better than her, but Joan's not admitting that. She says Annie is very manipulative. He says that's what poker players do, and she says that's all she is. Piers says she's playing Joan like a viola. Joan says she's not, but then goes on and on about Annie. He asks if she regrets calling Annie Hitler, and Joan doesn't miss a beat: "Yes, I do, because she doesn't have a moustache." Piers giggles. He asks what she would do to win a final against Annie, and she says she'd do anything. Piers doesn't dislike Joan, but thinks her venom against Annie is over-the-top. He doesn't think the mother and daughter relationship should come into this game. He thinks it's amazing how far Joan's gotten.
Trump and Piers move on to Annie. Piers says she is what she is: a fast-talking action girl, and probably the smartest girl in this competition by a lot. Piers says of course everyone goes after her, because everyone wants to shoot the fastest gun. What? That is not a metaphor that makes sense. In his interview with her, he tells her she's the one everyone feels they have to beat. She acts coy, and says she's played as well as she can, and is a good player, and will do anything to raise money for charity. She says Joan gets personal, and she never does that. She thinks other people don't understand the game like she does. Piers stops her and says she talks all the time. Piers says you can't faze Annie, so Joan should really stop trying. Trump asks about Jesse, and Piers says everyone assumes he's great, but he hasn't brought a dime in, despite being married to Sandra Bullock. Piers thinks Jesse must have more than he's showing, since Sandra married him. In his interview, Piers tells Jesse he confounds him, and can't figure out what he's about. He asks why he's here, and Jesse says to prove that regular, working-class people can achieve the same thing as someone in a suit. Piers points out that Jesse doesn't really lead a working-class lifestyle, and has a glamorous life. Jesse says he lives a regular life, but happens to have a wife who does what she does. Piers says Jesse must be special, and that there must be something going on inside his head. Jesse says he wants to win, but Piers wonders why he won't call his wife for money. He asks if Jesse's irritated at the assumption that he should ask his wife for money. Jesse says he keeps his life with his wife personal. Piers says this is for charity, and Jesse says he gets that and has been working hard and doing his own jobs, plus other people's. He thinks this is about getting the job done, not just raising money. Piers tells Trump he'd like to see Jesse's passion and aggression. Trump asks which two Piers would choose. Commercials.
More boardroom. Ivanka and Don are still there when the final four walk in, then Trump comes in. He asks Annie what she thinks of Piers. She thinks he's awesome. Trump says he's very opinionated, but it's ultimately Trump's decision. He asks why Annie should be in the final two, and she talks about her wins and her fund-raising and her not going to the boardroom again. I can't bring myself to write about it again, because I'm sick of hearing it. She would most like to compete against Joan in the final two, because she's the weakest in terms of fund-raising. Ivanka says Jesse also hasn't raised money, and Annie says maybe she should have said Jesse, who hasn't been that effective. Don says Joan should be able to raise money, and Annie says it's surprising her friends haven't given, and she feels bad for Joan. Joan tells her not to feel bad for her. Trump says what she said was a knock, and asks if she's always had that edge. Trump says she seemed like an innocent lamb in the beginning, but Joan says "Never." He asks Annie if she can get people to follow her since no one likes her. She says she has a lot of good friends, and people like her, and will donate money. Trump says the final task might not be about fund-raising.
Trump turns to Brande and asks if she can compete with Annie. She thinks she can, and is, in fact, the only one who can. Trump asks Joan if Brande can compete with Annie. Joan says Brande has no idea what she's saying now. She says Brande's very sweet and nice, and is so out of her league that she doesn't know she is. Trump asks if Brande's lucky to have gotten this far, and Joan says she's a nice girl, but if she looked like Joan, she wouldn't be sitting here now. You know, sort of like Melissa. Don raises his eyebrows, all, "Yeah, my dad's a total pig." Trump asks Brande why she deserves to be in the final two. She feels she's worked the hardest in this game, and has raised the most money other than Annie. She's put her heart into everything. Don asks if she could legitimately go one-on-one against any of these other three. She says "Absolutely," because that's what she's best at. Ivanka points out she's used Annie as a crutch in terms of presenting and talking to executives, and could she do it without Annie. Annie says she can, but Trump asks if she's been riding her coattails. Trump asks Annie if she thinks so. Annie says Brande's capable, but that she obviously has been the one who did everything. Joan thinks Brande's definitely been riding Annie's coattails. Trump says he thinks Brande's amazing, but Piers didn't. She says Piers met her for two minutes. He knows, but Piers has instinct. He thought it would be an embarrassment for her to make it to the final two. Trump says he disagrees with him, and thinks she's done everything great, but he doesn't thinks he has what it takes to win, so she's fired. Brande and Annie hug, and Brande wishes everyone good luck. In her post-interview, she was really disappointed and feels she should have been in the finals. She would have killed it.
Trump asks Jesse if he's holding back. He says no, he hasn't been holding back. He's not a salesman, but he doesn't like to talk and tell everyone how great he is. He'd rather just work the hardest and lead by example. Trump says Jesse's been low-key and under the radar. Jesse says Trump's judging just by what he sees in the boardroom. He's not low-key, and he is a leader, and not afraid to get his hands dirty. Trump asks Joan if she agrees, and she does. She says he has a company with 500 employees. I think it's interesting that Trump trusts Joan so much that he asks her opinion on everyone to the point that she's almost like his Don or Ivanka. (Maybe season!) Trump asks Joan is she has the stamina, and she tells him she's tap-dancing under the table while she talks to him. He says okay, but Piers was questioning that. She says she's done nothing but face challenges in her life, and nothing will stop her. Ivanka agrees with that, and says that she usually has more energy than the whole team. Trump turns to Annie and says she has to admit Joan's amazing and she should want to be like this. Annie agrees she's incredible, and says she has a lot of respect for her. She hopes she has as much energy as that. Ivanka asks what Joan's strategy would be in the final two if it comes to fund-raising. Joan says she'll make everything happen in her power, and will be on the phone fund-raising like hell.
Trump asks Joan what it means to be in the final two, and she says it means they might be able to get some vans for Gods Love We Deliver. Trump says she's done a great job for that. He asks Jesse what it would mean for him, and he says it would mean a lot. He says these are both professional women, and he has a blue-collar background and still works a blue-collar job. Trump asks why he should keep Jesse over Joan or Annie. Jesse says he loves Joan, but this competition is a lot bigger than her, with a lot of aspects that she doesn't know. She says she can do anything and has done everything that's ever been put in front of her. She says she's 75, and has never failed. Trump says Piers wasn't a fan of Jesse, and asks what he was not seeing in him. Jesse thinks it comes down to the politicking, and asks why he would raise all of the money on the first task. Trump asks if Jesse's saving his big knockout punch for the finals. He asks if Jesse will bring Sandra to the final. Jesse says he doesn't know, but it's a possibility. Trump asks if it bothers Annie that Jesse hasn't raised any money, and she says it does. Ivanka says saving all of your ammunition might put you in a situation where you never get to use it. Trump says Piers didn't get Jesse, and it might take awhile to figure him out. Trump says in one way he respects that Jesse hasn't used his wife, but he's also disappointed. He has a feeling that even in the final, he wouldn't use her, so he fires him. He tells him great job, and Jesse thanks everyone and leaves. Annie gets up to hug him, and he comes over and kisses Joan. Everyone loves Jesse. He interviews that he wanted to do a good job and show what he could do, which he feels he accomplished. He calls himself just "a welder from Long Beach." I love that he sees himself like that.
Trump congratulates Joan and Annie on making the final. Joan says it's fabulous, but interviews how unhappy she is about who she's playing against. Ivanka tells Joan that Melissa will be very proud. Joan's going to put on blinders and do everything she can to win. Annie tries to say she respects Joan, but Joan doesn't want to discuss it. Trump thinks Annie should just get on with her task, because she's not going to break Joan. He says complimenting her isn't going to work. Joan says fake compliments never work, and Annie says they're not fake, but then she interviews to the camera later that Joan's not a nice person and can't be a nice person and say the things she has about her. Okay, so ... fake compliments, then, right? Annie's just going to play really hard. She's now taking this personally. Trump tells them tomorrow (or, for us, week) will be tough, and one of them will be the new Celebrity Apprentice.
week: Finale. All of the drama was leading up to the live three-hour finale. It's the toughest task in eight seasons. Joan calls Annie disgusting in the boardroom. Wait. Did he just say THREE HOURS? I am so not ready for that. I'll try to be well-rested by Sunday so I can survive it.
DeAnn is a writer and editor in Portland, Oregon. You can contact her at twopmodmars@gmail.com.