So after my long-winded explanation of the "tags" last week, they didn't even show any tags this week, choosing instead to start the episode two minutes early, just to fuck with me. But I was ready for them!
Previously on The Real World: Mary-Ellis Bunim told them that if they get fired from their jobs, they have to leave the show. Quarrel said that she's not going to leave any show. Mike called girls "panty droppers," and Quarrel didn't like it, but Mike thought it was funny. Quarrel can't see herself having any kind of relationship with Mike where she's not remembering his past errors. On the phone, Quarrel told her friend that Mike is going down.
Lori puts Malik's hair into bunches of some sort as everyone wonders what their job will be. Kevin suggests that they could be taxi drivers. The Greenwich Village Idiot says that he'll be the dispatcher. Lori thinks it could be like Taxicab Confessions. Wow, a reality show inside a reality show. I think she just blew my mind.
The Greenwich Village Idiot makes up a fake letter saying they are going to be working at Big Roy's Waste Transfer system. This is the text of the letter, entirely sic:
Tired of all the down time; the remedy is work. You all may find your job somewhat distasteful; report to Big Roy's Waste Transfer Station on the right corner of 4th Ave. and Bleecker St. tomorrow at 5PM. Big Roy will be there to give you further details about your new jobs. Remember the rules, you get fired; you must leave. Have fun and get dirty.
Wow, Mike really loves the semicolon, and yet he didn't use it correctly even one time in that letter. ["That guy is in college? He sure is illiterate." -- Wing Chun] Mike types "Mary-Ellis Bunim and Jon Murray" at the bottom of the letter.
Statue of Liberty shot #2 of the season. In an interview, Rachel tells us that someone left a note on the computer. Has Mike never watched this show before? Doesn't he know that the job assignment information is always delivered by courier? I mean, if you're going to play a prank, put a little effort into it. Lori finds the letter on the computer and squints in disbelief. Lori tells the roommates that she called Information and no such place exists. Nicole says that she's not going, and Mike tells her that she'll get fired if she doesn't. In an interview, Rachel says that she suspected Mike wrote the letter, but didn't think he was clever enough to write it on his own. I guess none of them fell for it, since we never find out whether anyone went to the meeting, or if they found out that Mike wrote it. Nice follow-up, editors.
Rachel, Mike, and Lori go to a concert, but they're late. In an interview, Mike tells us that he and Rachel have an agreement to go to concerts together, alternating their interests. Mike promises them that they will get to the front, because he always does. Yeah, he's totally one of those assholes who pushes you aside and steps on your feet while spilling his beer on you. I hate those guys. Rachel yells out that she won't be with him at the concert because she's leaving him as soon as they get there. In an interview, Mike says that he feels Rachel was being rude. Mike tells her as much. Lori refuses to get involved.
Lori and Nicole check out the Arista website. In an interview, Lori says that she wants to be a singer, and that this job could help her reach her goal. She can't decide what to wear, because she wants to be "professional, but trendy." Nicole wants to be "funky." The morning, everyone is tired because they are not used to getting up at 7:00 AM. I feel them. ["Same here. The last time I got up that early, I seriously felt like I was going to vomit." -- Wing Chun] Lori was too anxious and excited to sleep. Rachel and Nicole are trying to figure out what to wear. In an interview, Kevin says that neither Lori nor Rachel has ever had a real job before, so they're nervous. Kevin doesn't feel pressure, but instead sees it as an opportunity. They finally all get ready to head out, with the guys bringing up the rear.
They walk to the Arista building. Well, they probably took mass transit of some sort, because it's on 57th, and while I don't know a lot about New York City, that seems like a pretty long walk from Greenwich Village. They meet up with Adam, VP of Marketing, and Devin, Director of Sales. Both men are wearing turtleneck sweaters. Is that like their uniform? The New Hip Non-Squiggly Font of Character Introduction adds that they work at Arista Records, like we were all confused. They all enter a conference room where they watch a video of Arista artists, such as Toni Braxton, Sarah McLachlan, Toni Braxton again, and then they start flashing really quickly, finishing up with Whitney Houston and Carlos Santana. Lori is "super-pumped" by the video. They applaud. Devin says that Arista is on a roll with regard to records on the Billboard charts. Adam teaches them (thank God) to pronounce the company name properly. Adam runs down the structure of a record company, explaining how the A&R department finds new artists, signs them, and helps them to make an album, which the marketing department then has to figure out how to sell. Adam explains that Arista is strong in R&B, but is trying to get established in the rock world, and that they need a street team. In an interview, Nicole says that she is not interested in rock music. You know, I don't think they asked her if she wanted to do this for a hobby. It's her job. I can already tell that her attitude is going to bug me. I don't like people who refuse to listen to a certain type of music. I'll listen to anything. I won't love everything, but I'll listen to it, and can usually find a song or an artist in that genre that I do enjoy. Adam explains that the street team "spreads the buzz from the ground up." In other words, they put up posters and flyers around the city. They're going to be the music industry version of the radio station job from the Seattle season. In an interview, Mike is excited because this is his kind of music. In an interview, Nicole says she is disappointed with the job because she thought they would be working with rap and R&B artists. Yeah, we get it. Mike loves the music. Nicole doesn't. They listen to a song by an act called From Zero. Mike is psyched by the music. No one else seems very interested.