Didi Benami is , singing the Linda Ronstadt song "You're No Good." A song I love, I should note. She's really concerned about letting her nerves get the best of her, even asking Miley "Does your heart ever..." she trails off and flutters her arms. Oh man, please don't let Didi have a seizure this season. The performance... it's weird. The original is all full of fire and outbursts of full-throated belting. Didi can't do that. Instead, she delivers something that sounds like slinky saloon music. Cabaret, but not in the bad way Simon usually talks about. It's unusual, and I'm certain I wouldn't buy a whole album of this stuff, but as a one-off, I like it.
The judges saw the same thing I did, they just didn't like it. Which: fair enough. Randy loved the idea but found it pitchy. Ellen just didn't get it. Kara says it was like Didi was "playing a character," which Simon picks up, talking about musicals. He says Didi stepped into the Lacey Brown role, and not in a good way. Didi pipes up that she didn't want to be "pigeonholed," but honestly, this is a battle she's not going to win.
Performing last is Siobhan Magnus, and not a moment too soon. She's singing "Superstition," another woefully typical song choice, but what can I even say about that at this point? Miley tells her that her voice has "swagger," which makes Siobhan laugh because: WTF is Miley even talking about? I can't worry about that, because holy shit, Siobhan brought the Sheena Easton hair onstage. God, but I do love her. Vocally, this is like a stronger and more confident version of Siobhan's "Think" performance. She's really developing the notes in between her impeccably controlled lower register and that power shriek that everybody seems to love. That's still there, too, though. The shriek. She's getting very Adam Lambert with her reliance on that crutch, and I'd hope she could put it away for a week or two.
Of course, when the judges flip for her like this, there isn't much incentive to change anything. Randy loved how she "went for it," while Ellen quotes Dickens and asks for "more, please." Kara shows that she gets the onstage siren/offstage spazz dichotomy that is Siobhan and why we love her. Simon's the only one who seems uneasy about the sameiness of Siobhan's latest performances. He advises she maybe move The Scream up to the front of the performance time. I'm not sure that helps, but at least he's asking her to think on those lines. He knows it's becoming a gimmick. He advises Siobhan, and all the singers who aren't Crystal, to start pushing themselves, because this was not a good night.
To review: Crystal was amazing, Siobhan was excellent with reservations, Didi was pleasing but maybe only to me, Casey performed a ridiculous song well, Aaron performed a tired-ass song well, Katie almost got there with Fergie, Lee was disappointing and nervous, Big Mike has decided to keep giving that one performance he does reasonably well, Tim and Andrew embarrassed themselves in their own special ways, and Paige needs to be off this show.
Tomorrow: Jacob still has to recap Miley, only this time it's a highly bleep-bloopable performance. Enjoy the rest of the season, folks!
Joe R remembers when we had to make drunk-uncle jokes about Taylor Hicks uphill both ways, and Katharine McPhee dirndl tops cost a quarter. Questions, comments, and unadulterated love can be sent to him at joseph.reid21@gmail.com.
Is Simon deliberately sabotaging Idol?