Previously on Real World: Annoying picks up the middle-aged keyboard player for a local band, and he spends the night. Wonder Bread says, "Every time a guy is presented to our household, Amaya falls for him. How does one's heart go from man to man so easily?" I wonder why he can't talk like a normal human being. Maybe he's been hanging around Tetanus Girl too much -- but wait, that comes later. Annoying talks to her parents on the phone about Ruthie. Ruthie tells us that Annoying is shutting her out. Annoying says Ruthie is being petty and lame.
Colin has another friend visiting. Have you noticed that Colin and Ruthie are the only ones who have friends come to visit? If I were in Hawaii, I think all of my friends would come out, you know? Anyway, Colin is showing him around the house, and we find out the visitor's name is Tony and that he and Colin have known one another since the sixth grade. Colin introduces Tony to Annoying. Big mistake. Huge. In a confessional, Annoying says, "Tony's cute. He's got that lean, almost swimmery [sic]-looking physique." Tony and Colin are getting the surfboards to go hit the beach and Annoying is hanging out in the hammock, watching them. Boy, she's not subtle at all, is she? She tells us that she's getting "wonderful, wonderful vibrations" from Tony and then says, "Oh my God, that sounds sooooo bad!" I can't believe she actually has a sense of shame after last week's vaginal blister episode. I mean, I would far rather say that someone gave me good vibrations than discuss genitalia problems. Colin and Tony head off to the beach and I notice that carved on the railing, it says "R (HEART) K." Is that Ruthie loves Kaia? Did Ruthie do that when she was drunk one night?
Tony and Colin surf. Little girls squeal at the sight of Colin with no shirt. In a confessional, Colin says that his advice to Tony regarding Annoying was, "Yeah" (as he makes a big thumbs-up sign and then turns it upside down) "Not really! She is a big negative. Don't do it."
Ruthie is on the phone with Malo, who invites Ruthie over to pick up a present. Ruthie tries to guess what the present is while Teck totally listens in on the conversation. These people need to get a cordless phone so they can go hide in the closet while on the phone or something. I know the producers can tap the phone lines. I wonder if they can also read e-mail? They must. I'm surprised that hasn't come up. Anyway, Ruthie guesses that Malo got her a car and then agrees to come over and see what it is. Teck says he wants nothing to do with Malo, and hopes she and Ruthie are happy, unless of course Malo flirts with him. I think the crew cracked up when Teck said that. That's the last time we see Teck until the closing credits. Ruthie goes to Malo's apartment and Malo gives her a CD single of the song "Kiss Me" by Sixpence None the Richer. Anyway, Ruthie plays the CD and they lie in bed and talk without making any sense, as usual. Then Ruthie gets up and tells us in a voice-over that any relationship is out of the question right now, and she leaves the building. Also, Malo looks exactly like Laura Ballard from Homicide.
Back at the house, Annoying asks Colin if he wants any popcorn. Colin is practicing the time-honored eighth-grade tradition of not speaking to her even though she is asking him a direct question. Annoying asks if he will talk to her, if he's going to be mad at her forever, and if he's going to be annoyed with her forever. He doesn't answer and she kind of shrugs and walks away. Tetanus Girl uses her Colin-mind-reading powers to tell us that Colin is genuinely hurt and by making comments that he is not hurt, he is trying to cover up the fact that he is. Colin says, "Amaya ties her feelings, whether she's happy [sic], to whether she's intimate with a man or not and that's pathetic." I think I said that like four or five recaps ago. Annoying says that she does want to talk to Colin because nothing happened between her and Tony.
Ruthie and Wonder Bread are talking. Wonder Bread has on sunglasses indoors, for no reason. Ruthie says she learned, from going through break-ups, that she shouldn't dwell on the break-up. Wonder Bread says that she's "rebounding" with Malo. Ruthie says that she's not. In a confessional, Wonder Bread says that "Ruthie enjoys kissing Malo." All I have to say is that I would like Wonder Bread to keep both hands in plain sight of the camera during this confessional. He goes on to say that Ruthie's been without affection for so long that she's going to hang on to Malo and then once she gets her feet back on the ground, she'll go find another meaningful relationship. In other words, Ruthie is using Malo. I don't know why he couldn't just say that. Ruthie says that some people mistake lust for love. Thanks, Plato. There's a philosophy of life I've never heard before.
Ruthie and Malo are walking on the beach at night. Ruthie tells us that their relationship is no one's business. The two of them are sitting on a pier and then they strip down and jump into the water. Ruthie says she cares about Malo, but "I'm just chilling." What is it with these people and chilling? You'd think they were in Alaska instead of Hawaii. Ruthie asks Malo if they are going back to her place, and says it doesn't have to be complicated. Ruthie is kind of like a guy.
A hard rock guitar riff lets us know that the shit is about to hit the fan. In the kitchen, Annoying asks Colin to please talk to her and tries to stand in his way so that he can't ignore her. He says no and keeps pushing her out of the way. Are they four years old? Annoying tries massaging Colin's shoulders and telling him to loosen up and he pushes her off him and says he is going to the confessional. After he leaves, Annoying starts whining to Tetanus Girl about how no one will talk to her. Tetanus Girl says she's making a big deal out of nothing and not to try so hard, but in a very dismissive way. Annoying says she's "trying to talk to [Kaia] toooo and you keep going away tooooo." Tetanus Girl walks out of the room and yells back that Annoying sounds desperate. Annoying says she's not. Colin is in the confessional room, chowing down his dinner.
There is dramatic choral music, and we see a cliff diver. Then we see Annoying crying really hard while on the phone with her mom. She whines to Mommy about how mean everyone is being to her, and how alienated she feels and how she wants to come home. Her mom really doesn't help -- she just keeps saying, "Whyyy? Whyyy are they maaaad?" In a confessional, Annoying says that she has tried to put on a happy face and act as strong as she can. That sentence is intercut with shots of her crying to her mom. Get it? She's saying she's strong and yet bawling her eyes out? As I've said before, the producers must hate her. Annoying says she hates that they have been breaking her down and she will not let these people ruin her. We see the cliff diver again and more dramatic music.
Annoying asks Ruthie if they can talk outside. Ruthie tells us that Annoying is looking for an ally because everyone in the house is against her, and since Ruthie went through the same thing, she gets tapped. Or it could be because she's already gotten shot down by everyone else and Teck isn't home. Ruthie says she was upset about getting kicked out, but it made her reflect. She asks Annoying why she was so negative when Ruthie first returned to the house. Annoying says she was scared that Ruthie would blame them all for kicking her out. Ruthie asks how being so negative was supposed to help her and Annoying agrees that she was wrong. Ruthie tells Annoying that now she knows how it feels to be so alienated and have no one to turn to, and says that you get back what you put out, so maybe this is Annoying's karmic justice. In a confessional, Ruthie says that she was the only one in the house who chose not to talk crap about Amaya, which is ironic since Amaya was so mean to her when she first got back. Ruthie tells Annoying to think positively and have fun, and not to care what the others think. Annoying says that she's not going to let it get to her anymore. They hug and Annoying says that she wants to rise above her housemates' devious behavior.
Annoying walks up to Wonder Bread, who is of course wearing his GREEN SHIRT! She asks him what is going on. Wonder Bread, in typical wordy fashion, says, "There are many individuals in this house who feel you've done a lot of talking behind their [sic] back and being sweet to their [sic] face." He finishes by saying that now no one trusts her. Does anyone else think it's a bit hypocritical of Wonder Bread to get angry about someone talking behind people's backs? ["Hey, I did! I said so a bunch of paragraphs ago! -- Wing Chun] Isn't that his sole purpose on the show, pretty much? Annoying asks why this came up, all of a sudden and Wonder Bread says that it wasn't sudden. Annoying asks if the general consensus is that everyone hates her and no one answers. Okay, I felt bad for her at this point. She's just so pathetic and they are totally ganging up on her.