Episode Report Card Miss Alli: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Phoenix Is the New New York
By Miss Alli | Season 4 | Episode 13 | Aired on 08.20.2003
In the Who plane, David voices over that this is the first time either of them has tried skydiving. Apparently, looking out horizontally and seeing nothing but a vast sky full of clouds made David say, and I quote, "Oh, my God." Actually, with the clouds and everything, maybe it may not be so much "Oh, my God," as it is, "Oh, it's my God! Right over there!" In his plane, Reichen says that once he got up in the plane, he just resolved not to be afraid, because he'd "rather be doing this than sitting in the back of that car when Chip is driving." HA! Cute. And accurate. And what very scenic rivulets of sweat those are on Chip's face. Kelly, on the other hand, says that she was doing all right until she looked down and saw how high it was, which made her freak out. One does have to wonder what she was expecting. David is the first actually out of the plane, and he seems to take it pretty well. He screams, "Wooooo!" because that's the law. Kelly, however, is wigged enough that she's rendered imprecise with her use of clichés, and she voices over about the feeling of your stomach being "literally" caught in your throat. Sadly, I think her stomach is teeny enough by this point in the race that she wouldn't even cough if that were true. Jeff drops out of the lead plane next. When we return to David, I note that his skydiving instructor (to whom he's so very securely fastened) looks just like Andrew Dan-Jumbo. Maybe he skydives and makes banquettes.
Preparing for the jump, Kelly makes various stressed-out faces, as we hear her voice over that she was "scared to death." "I knew I couldn't do it," she says.
Commercials. I'm sorry, but a medication that cures your aversion to pollen and causes "headache, nosebleed, and sore throat" doesn't sound like a bargain.
David and Andrew Dan-Jumpo are spinning through the air. Their chute opens, and they shoot away from the camera. I guess the camera guy doesn't get a chute. He just falls to the earth, because he's a pro, dammit. Up in the plane, Kelly allows that she was "in panic mode" as they waited for the jump. She says that if the guy had given her much time to think about it, she would have chickened out. Fortunately, he didn't. Kelly and her instructor fall out the door and into the air. Their chute opens, and her skin ripples rather hilariously as she manages a smiley sort of scream. Jon and his guy are right behind her. The Chipsters follow, with Chip actually giving a grin and a big, cheesy thumbs-up as he stands in the doorway. Sometimes, he is every motivational speaker ever, all wrapped up in one guy.