Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | 4 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT Here I Go Again
By Jacob Clifton | Season 3 | Episode 15 | Aired on 02.19.2012
As though he could somehow sense Kalinda indulging in her annual smile, Eli calls.
Eli, without prelude: "Did you talk to Stacie Hall?"
Kalinda: "It is not a good time."
Eli: "No, this episode takes place immediately after the last one, so I just found out that Amy Sedaris is running my ex-wife's Congressional campaign and I need to scream and scream..."
Kalinda: "-- I am talking to Syria, I don't have time for your bin Laden-fucking crazy wife talk right now. Click."
PARTY GIRL HQ
Vanessa: "Oh, hell. Why are you here at my door, screaming into your phone?"
Eli: "WHY!?"
Vanessa: "Why. What."
Eli: "Why did my lunatic demon ex hire my insane kobold girlfriend to run her State Senate campaign?"
Vanessa: "Why does my hysterical leprechaun ex-husband care?"
Eli: "It is a sex game! Or politics in some way! She's trying to upset me!"
Vanessa, and true that: "My mistake. I thought my campaign was about me, but of course it's about you. Actually, I went for her, not the other way around."
Eli: "So it IS about me! You went after my competitor. Who has already poached three of my clients anyway!"
Vanessa: "Listen carefully. You turned me down, so I went to another strategist of your caliber. Why are you like this?"
Eli: "BECAUSE THIS IS WHAT I AM LIKE!"
But because he's Eli, he can't just drop the mic on it -- he has to glance around her campaign HQ and make some quick suggestions. Like, her materials are eco-green, which is a bad call for anybody because that's not a real platform so it just makes you seem like a health food or skin care product, and her pictures make her look harsh, and she needs more golden light -- which the ex-Mrs. Gold says Stacie already ruled out, as a color -- and whatever. He can't help himself. It helps you remember why we want him on the show at all. He yells advice at her like he's calling her a bitch, and she just laughs him off and shoves him out the door. But it's Eli, there is no ignoring him once he's in your head.
SYRIA CLASS
Viola: "Your objective in this episode is twofold. One, you have to prove he knew he was selling to Syria, which is going to be hard anyway, and two, that he knew it was going to be used to capture and kill protestors."
Samir: "I have an invoice that proves the middleman you'll be looking for later."
Kalinda, with a thumbs-up to Will: "Thanks. I'll call you later."
Samir: "No, you won't. You'll send me an email with three question marks and I will call you."
Kalinda: "Right. I keep forgetting how you live in a constant state of probably dying."