Episode Report Card Pamie: C | 120 USERS: C+ YOU GRADE IT Vote Or Die
By Pamie | Season 5 | Episode 4 | Aired on 2004.10.12
Taylor is giving an etymology lesson concerning why ticks are bad. Everybody's grossed out and wishes he'd stop telling them the particulars of how they suck blood and how much blood they suck. "Don't hate the tick messenger; hate the tick!" Regardless, the town overwhelmingly vetoes Taylor's proposal to erect signs warning townspeople to tuck their pants in their socks to avoid tick bites. Taylor calls them an irresponsible, devil-may-care majority. He calls to order the matter of Stars Hollow versus Jackson. Taylor explains that Jackson's greenhouse is six inches too close to his house, and that he'll have to move it. Jackson is apoplectic, because he'd have to tear down the greenhouse and build it again, as he didn't build the structure on wheels. Taylor tuts that it would have been much easier if Jackson had built the thing on wheels. Taylor says he's there to enforce the rules, and all he can do is hold Jackson in violation, because that's what he's supposed to do as Town Selectman. Despite the pleadings of Lorelai and Sookie, Taylor is firm in holding the structure up to town code. Lorelai tells him to oil his knees and go see the Wizard about a heart. Taylor knows Lorelai is only upset because of her parking situation. Lorelai says it's stupid to reject the form because she left out her middle name. "How many other Lorelai Gilmores do you know?" Taylor says he does know Lorelai's daughter. Busted, Lorelai says that's it, unless Taylor knew her grandmother as well. Taylor tries to adjourn the meeting, telling Jackson that he is only the humble vessel for the municipal code. Jackson decides it's time for a different vessel. "I'm running." He asks Taylor what office he holds. Taylor: "Town Selectman." Jackson: "I'm running for Town Selectman." Miss Patty says nobody ever runs against Taylor. Sookie asks Jackson if he's sure about this. Taylor accepts the challenge and looks forward to a lively race. "Competition is the whetstone that sharpens the blade of democracy." He adjourns the meeting. Lorelai and Jackson start pumping hands to gain some votes. Lorelai and Sookie discuss campaign strategy. The first draft of their slogan: "Taylor sucks like a tick."
Rory rings CuteDean's bell. Rory enters and tells CuteDean that his mom got a new plant. Clara, CuteDean's sister, is so happy to see Rory, and acts like it's the first time she's seen her, which is weird, since Rory's been coming over there every other night. Clara tells Rory that she never liked Lindsay anyway. Hey! He's still married to the girl. Jeez. If that's the same girl who has always played Clara, I'm feeling old. CuteDean's mom gets bitchface with Rory, coldly informing her that she's too late for dinner. CuteDean says they're going upstairs.