Episode Report Card Lady Lola: C | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Father, Faker
By Lady Lola | Season 3 | Episode 21 | Aired on 05.07.2009
Jack's office. Lemon introduces the possible pops one by one. First up, George Park, a very nice Korean man. Next, Fred O'Dwyer, whose twigs and berries were blown to smithereens during World War 2. Finally, Professor Milton Green (Alan Alda!), who has that trademark Jack Donaghy rasp -- until he clears his throat. Jack OMGs to Lemon.
Downstairs. Pete apprises Lemon that Jenna is having a photo shoot with Time Out New York because they're naming her the "Funniest Woman in New York." Lemon: "What time do they need me to make her funny?" Looks like sour Lemon = sour grapes. Pete tries to pacify Lemon, saying that Jenna acknowledges her part in the writing. Lemon groans that she does all the work and gets none of the credit. Pete reminds her that this kind of grunt work is technically in the TGS non-performer contract. Lemon stands strong on crashing Jenna's photo shoot.
They head toward the kitchen, where they spy Donald wrapping up half a muffin to save for later. It's only more fuel for their fire as they conclude that this is decidedly not 21-year-old behavior. Meanwhile, the ostensibly predatory Donald hones in on Kenneth to sell him some magazine to benefit his... ummmm... community center. Kenneth signs up for four (any four will do) at the price of $80. He hands the cash to Donald, who promises to get Kenneth's address from Tracy. Lemon and Pete vow to stop Donald. Lemon is already working on getting a copy of his birth certificate. Pete nixes that option, so they decide to test Donald on his supposed karate expertise. Lutz just happens to know karate (and how to shove about 12 gummy worms in his mouth at once), so he offers to help. [Does he still have that wall-inflicted brain damage? It's kind of hard to tell. - Zach]
Upstairs, Jack continues the decidedly non-musical, non-hilarious bio-pop meet-up. He asks the three gentlemen if any of them have a history of mental illness in their families. That would be an affirmative for Private Spaghetti Privates. Long story short, workplace massacre. Milton says that his family members are horrifyingly self-aware to their last breaths. Jack asks about Milton's last name, probing whether he runs into a lot of other Greens at church, etc. Milton notes that his people are agnostic secular humanists as he walks over to Jack's picture of Tom DeLay and starts in on a rant about Republicans. Yep, Jack's bio-pop is a dyed-in-the-wool, liberal-to-the-core, homo-loving Commie bastard. Jack deems Milton a great disappointment, and they have a short yelling match that prompts Milton to storm out, yelling, "Screw you! And your fakakta contest!" Wouldn't you know it? He's a Jew to boot. This = Jack's personal nightmare.