Episode Report Card Deborah: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Jew Of Arcadia
By Deborah | Season 2 | Episode 10 | Aired on 11.25.2004
Joan goes straight to Grace's locker and tells Grace, "If you want any help with your mitzvah thing…" Grace makes a sound of horror as she slams her locker and tells Joan to just stay out of her face: "It's enough of a nightmare as it is." She takes off, leaving Joan standing there blinking. Theme song.
Will is questioning Judith's stupid friend Ryan about his recollection of her stabbing. Ryan's got a lawyer there. I'm going to try to make this brief, because the police stuff is wearing on me, and also? Ten episodes in a row already. I'm tired, people. Will says they know Ryan witnessed the stabbing and isn't the one who did it. He pressures him for a name or description. Ryan can't remember anything. His lawyer also insists he never admitted to buying any drugs. Will gets irritated with her constant intrusions. Will tries to guilt-trip Ryan but the kid keeps working the Alzheimer defense. His lawyer calls an end to the interrogation. Lucyfer's watching all this through the window. She and Will glance at each other just as she takes off, leading with her jaw. It's the Head Tilt of I'm Damn Well Gonna Fix This, Because I'm Beelzebub And I Can.
Will follows Ryan and his lawyer out into the main office area to ask if he can speak with her for a moment. She tells Ryan to wait for her downstairs. After he trots off, Will tries to apply pressure to his lawyer, whose name is Catherine, saying he's not into busting Ryan on a little drug charge. She says he's scared and his parents want her to protect him. Will: "Guilt-trip." Catherine: "Predictable excuse." Will: "More personally relevant guilt-trip." Catherine: "Ineffectual warning." Will: "Pressure, guilt, pressure." Catherine: "Polite suggestion." Will: "Last-ditch attempt at guilt." Catherine: "Unconvincing expression of support." She takes off.
Grace is wandering through the halls, lost in her anxieties, when Luke runs into her and asks what he can do for her bat mitzvah. She replies, "Nothing. I just want it to come and go quickly. Like Hoobastank." Ha! Friedman and Glynis are catching up behind him. Friedman advises her, "Savour it, Marge. I tell you, when the hora starts, you're up in that chair…now that's a rush." Glynis: "But don't crowd surf. The elderly aren't prepared for it." The chair? Isn't that more a wedding thing? Is that done at bar/bat mitzvoth? Glynis is wearing an outfit I could swear one of my Barbies had in 1974: A white blouse with a Peter Pan collar, black sweater vest, and a red plaid skirt with a matching red plaid tie. It wasn't my favourite Barbie outfit then and it still isn't. Are ties in for girls now? Because Officious Hall Monitor God was wearing one, too, and I don't care for them. Not something I want to look at for a couple of seasons. Grace sighs, "Look, just come to my stupid party, laugh at the chocolate fountain, make fun of my relatives, and if you're good maybe we can make out behind the DJ booth." I thought she was talking to all of them, but now it's clear she just means Luke. Friedman leans forward to comment, "Sweet." Grace: "Shut up, Friedman!" Luke: "I'm just saying, if you need anything…" Grace: "No, I'm serious, dude, please -- just leave me alone, and no one gets hurt." She disappears into the classroom. Glynis comments, "You wanted someone more emotionally complex. Enjoy." She flounces into the classroom too. He did? When was that? Luke and Friedman stand there for a moment, puzzling over girls. Then Friedman asks Luke what he got Grace for her bat mitzvah. Luke says she told him not to get her anything: "I thought it was like a religious thing." Friedman snorts a little, throwing his arm around Luke's shoulder: "Rabbi Friedman will guide the goyim." G-d help the goyim, or at least, just this one poor goy.