Episode Report Card Potes: A | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Down At Snaggle Rock
By Potes | Season 6 | Episode 7 | Aired on 04.18.2006
Jay tells the girls the character breakdown. Joanie will be a ventriloquist's doll. Sara will be a teen doll. Furonda will be a rag doll. Jade will be a mannequin. Brooke will be a glam doll. Nnenna will be a baby doll. And finally, Danielle will be a marionette.
A lengthy Pantene commercial ensues, as the girls get made up. Joanie gets to work with a male model who will play her puppetmaster. Danielle interviews that Joanie was the only one to get a male model, and that everyone else wanted to share him. Danielle calls him a hottie with a body, and notes that he was nice eye candy for the day. He oils himself up and, indeed, is totally ripped. Nnenna's sizeable jaw practically drops off her face when she sees him. He also is sporting a drawn-on handlebar moustache, which somehow makes him all the hotter. A drawn-on handlebar moustache is the new six-pack.
Joanie is up first. She looks pretty cool. Jay tells her to pretend she's in a traveling circus. Because nothing says haute couture like a snaggletoothed carny. Jay tells her to smile in a few frames. Joanie interviews that, because of the snaggle, she's used to always trying to hide her teeth. We see this, in what she interprets as "a smile," in the next few frames. She says that all the girls there have straight teeth, and that she feels like the snaggle is the only thing holding her back. I was going to make some snarky comment about her age, but I love Joanie, and plus everyone else left with the exception of Danielle is practically receiving Social Security checks, so I will just leave it alone.
Sara is next, and Jay tells her to give attitude and sass. Instead, she gives platitude and ass. She's in a box, and tries to put her arms out to the side. Jay tells her that dolls are usually a little tighter and not packaged like that. Brooke interviews that she will also have to pose in a box, and that, when she saw Sara struggle, she wondered if she would have difficulty with the shoot as well.
Indeed, glam doll Brooke looks awkward and uncomfortable. Jay asks her what's going on in her head, and she goes, "I'm supposed to look like a doooooooooooll??????" Jay says yes (and adds a silent "you idiot"), and also says that she's a glam doll and, therefore, should look glamorous. Jay tells Brooke to pretend that she's being a bit of an exhibitionist for her boyfriend. Brooke looks even more uncomfortable, so Jay tells her to imagine that her boyfriend is standing there in front of her, naked. Jesus, she's not "I Touch Myself Barbie." Brooke pouts, and interviews that she's getting more and more frustrated because she's hearing only negative feedback. When Brooke's shoot is over, she cries, and Jay tells her that she needs to be comfortable in her skin and that she can't think about being cut while she's doing the shoot.
Next is Miss Danielle, who makes a really cool-looking marionette. Danielle interviews that the heat is on, on the street, tell me can you feel it, tell me can you feel it, tell me can you feel it, and that this is the first photo shoot where they have to be in character, but still remember that they're models. Really? Jay says that Danielle is feeling it and is giving "puppet, but model."