Episode Report Card Joe R: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Release The Hounds
By Joe R | Season 3 | Episode 9 | Aired on 10.07.2007
Doug gets prevented for accessing the Majestic golf club, despite his membership, because Sullivan's vengeful like that. Doug says he's not budging, no matter how many cars pile up behind him, so we cut to Doug's van getting towed, with Doug inside it. He pledges that "this," whatever it is, is not over.
"Teach him how to grow," says Nancy, to Conrad, re: Silas. And say what you will about the poor parenting decision to set your kid up with an apprenticeship at a grow house, but considering Conrad is by far the most positive male role model on the show, maybe this isn't the worst thing Nancy's done as a mother. Not even just this week. Of course, Conrad wants no part of it, not least because Silas is the "little fucker" who stole their stash and got them into all their trouble to begin with. Nancy's explicit about wanting Conrad to be a "mentor" and a "positive role model" for Silas, even though I'm pretty sure we in the audience could come to that conclusion on our own. Nancy tries to sweet-talk Conrad into it, but what eventually works is $10 an hour, which Conrad points out is on the cheap side of the current suburban babysitting market, so she tosses in a Rolex as well. "Go on," she says. "Make my boy your bitch." Conrad kind of likes the sound of that. Not in a creepy, rapey way. Just in a "Silas is gonna have to fucking work" way, which I think we can all get behind.
Dean's hospital room, where he's currently being visited by the Goofus twins, Andy and Doug. And, of course, there's a hot nurse in the room wearing, like, a mini-dress masquerading as a uniform (it's bright teal, like we're in Don't Tell Mom The Babysitter's Dead all of a sudden), which essentially validates Andy's existence in the scene. If there's no avenue for him to be gross or inappropriate, what's the point? To that end, Andy and Doug's sympathy for their fallen friend gets sidetracked when they figure they can gank some of his morphine drip, because in the Degenerate Olympics, they're in a fierce battle for the gold. They do, however, promise Dean that they'll be able to help pay for his rehab with the money that will soon be flowing again from the reestablished MILF business. Is Dean even in the MILF business anymore? He'd better hope his benefits haven't expired.
Celia's explaining to Sullivan that she's going to have to sell her house in Majestic to pay for Dean's rehab. Sullivan tells her she can't sell the house, seeing as she doesn't really own the house, since he acquired it through shady means and gave it to her as a bribe. She asks if he can sell the house for her, but he doesn't seem interested in doing that. He tells Celia she'll think of something. Thanks, boyfriend!