Episode Report Card Joe R: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Release The Hounds
By Joe R | Season 3 | Episode 9 | Aired on 10.07.2007
That night, at the Botwins', Nancy, Andy, and Sanjay are talking business, specifically how they're going to move the giant order of weed they picked up last week, while Shane sits at the table getting evermore psychologically damaged. Sanjay (in a pink strappy tank -- hee), confirms that his territory is "colleges, junior colleges, trade schools, and gay bars and dance clubs, 'cause I'm a faggot." He says he can call himself a faggot, because he's gay and it's empowering. Nancy says the rule is they sell only to their old customers at first, expanding only to those who get vouched for. Of course, here's Silas and Tara to fuck that all up. Sanjay greets Silas by telling him he's gay (remember when Sanjay was Silas's tutor? That seems like it happened on a different show altogether), and Tara says he can get help for that. "Oh, I know," says Sanjay. "This guy Stewart has been really helping me." Ha! Nancy nudges Silas to get rid of the eighty-pound bag of narc he's currently not having sex with before they talk any more business. Of course, Silas has already told Tara about everything, because what's almost getting busted with a metric ton of weed in your trunk to make you even a little bit more cautious? He tries to sell Nancy on the idea of he and Tara tapping the Christian market in Majestic. Tara bullshits about how "they say" that when John the Baptist anointed Jesus Christ, it was with cannabis oil (Sanjay: "Whoa, that's hot.") and that God wants her to sell pot, so she can afford that BMW that He also wants her to have. "The good Christian people of Majestic like to get baked," Silas smirks, seemingly reveling in the hypocrisy, though so completely oblivious of the, I'll say it again, eighty-pound bag of hypocrisy to his right. Shane's all, "That explains so much," about the Majestic Christians being potheads, even though it doesn't explain anything at all. Nancy hates this idea, but the cat's already out of the bag, so she lets Tara in. She gives her Silas's cell phone, though, because Silas is being demoted for not exercising discretion. Awesome. If there were a spinoff to this show called "Taking Silas Down A Peg," I would watch it every week.
Shane says some lady named "Valerie" is at the door, which certainly has Nancy interested. Cut to Val at the door, who apologizes for "acting like an asshole" earlier. Now that they're both stalkers, the vibe is a lot more cordial between them. Back in Val's car, Tim's being obnoxious with the horn (he's on his way to therapy, thank God), so she can't stay, but she brought Nancy a gift: an effervescent bath ball. "My advice is to let it bubble between your legs," Val says. Okay, this is both the most inappropriate beginning to a friendship ever yet also completely up Nancy's alley. Val's gotta go, but she remembers to tell Nancy that her boobs are "fine and benign" before she does. "Aren't you glad I'm not a proctologist?" she smirks. "Well," Nancy says, "you have short fingernails but a lot of anger, so..." Hee. Before Val can go smack her kid and take him to his shrink, Nancy invites her to dinner tomorrow. Love this pairing.