Episode Report Card M. Giant: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Low Noon
By M. Giant | Season 3 | Episode 23 | Aired on 05.17.2004
It's 11:09:01, and Lady Mac is sunning herself on the porch of her fabulous beach house when her phone rings. It's Palmer. I notice they've pretty much given up on that "please hold for the President" routine. Lady Mac doesn't seem too impressed that Palmer's calling her, even when he says he might be ready to match Keeler's offer. Palmer tells her it's in both their best interests to discuss it, and he would be right if he weren't lying. He prefers to discuss it in person rather than on the phone, and names a local baseball field to meet her at in twenty-five minutes. She makes noises about the short notice. To his credit, he doesn't fold. He even claims that he's got a busy schedule, and if he has to change meetings around, people will notice. At least he's getting better at lying. Lady Mac acquiesces. I wish someone would point out to her that murderers tend to go to jail longer than accessories-after-the-fact.
Palmer hangs up and immediately calls Brother Palmer, who is parked across the street from Lady Mac's house. Foxton is pacing outside the car, so it's clear that they aren't making out. Why does Brother Palmer have his own car? We know it's not Foxton's car, because we saw them leave that behind in the garage last week. Did Brother Palmer drive to Los Angeles from Washington, D.C.? And if not, why would he have bothered to rent a car in L.A.? I would think the Chief of Staff would get to ride in the Presidential motorcade. But whatever. The Brothers Palmer remind each other why Brother Palmer is there with Foxton, and Palmer promises to keep Lady Mac out of the house as long as possible. So I'm thinking ten minutes, max. He hangs up, ordering Brother Palmer to "Find it." So much for plausible deniability.
11:10:51. Kiefer leads Saunders, flanked by two agents, up the steps to Inn Fection. Less than two minutes ago they were still at the Sixth Street Bridge. Damn, did they travel by helicopter or slingshot? A large plastic umbilical has been set up at Inn Fection's entrance, and two gas-masked agents are standing guard. Hazmaticians are visible through the front window, as are dozens of covered bodies. Kiefer lectures Saunders, but Saunders has more gnomic excuses. I'm so tired of terrorists who spend more time hatching their evil schemes than thinking of why the schemes are necessary in the first place. Kiefer's not any more interested in Saunders's justifications than I am, and goes right into K3. Saunders isn't frightened at the thought of being put inside Inn Fection; he's prepared to die for his cause. Actually, Saunders, you'd be dying with your cause, since you're the only one who knows what you want. Via walkie-talkie, Kiefer gives an order to Special Agent Charlie Brown, who leads Spawnders out of the helicopter we just saw take off in the background less than a minute ago. It's back on the ground when they get out, drat the luck.