Episode Report Card Monty Ashley: C- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT The Return of Francisco
By Monty Ashley | Season 5 | Episode 6 | Aired on 03.12.2009
Anyway, the red team gets to redecorating. And the blue team gets facials and scrubs and things, which they emphasize they have never had before. J goes into a frenzy of third-person telling us all the things that J has never done. If you don't like Robert, you will probably not enjoy the shot of him getting loofahed. The red team has some trouble setting up the dance floor (it's made up of several separate squares) because Carol and Andrea hate each other and can't work together. Lacey, the only woman on the blue team, is the only one apparently allowed to enjoy being rubbed down with oil without having to tell us how weird it was.
The red team continues to have trouble with the dance floor until someone notices that it's actually a basketball court. Paula tells us that the light in her brain is flashing, which I believe is a sign of epilepsy. The dance floor finally comes together, which is a process that involves hammering.
As the blue team returns, shouting "Mazel tov!", the red team is filling balloons and rolling their eyes at the way the blue team is wearing sunglasses inside. The blue team enthusiastically and obnoxiously goes off to get in the red team. And we get a shot of the moon, which, astonishingly, is full. I know! What are the odds that after pretending the moon is full every single night, we'd see another shot of the moon, and it would still be full? Anyway, it's back to work for everyone. The night's menu will include the regular menu (you know, the one they keep screwing up) as well as the three winning dishes. Danny asks Ben if a bar mitzvah is "the chair deal", and Ben agrees that it's "the Jews' signature move."
Chef Ramsay seems a little frantic as he calls the chefs over for a pregame tension-inducer. He says that it's the most important service ever in Hell's Kitchen and that it's absolutely essential that they finish the service. I think he calls Max "Matt" here. The dining room is decorated in a basketball theme, starting with the basketball-court dance floor and including a scoreboard (with the name "MAX" in huge letters). Francisco is wearing a yarmulke that looks like a basketball. Now send in the guests!
Francisco opens the festivities with "Ladies and Gentlemen, boys and girls..." but unfortunately, he does not add "...dyin' time's here." I suppose a Thunderdome shoutout was a longshot. Actually, he just introduces Max Rubin. Everyone applaud! Max is seated at the head of the room, where I'm pretty sure he will be able to hear all of the shouting from the kitchen.