Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | 1 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT Shoppe Of Li'l Horrors
By Jacob Clifton | Season 2 | Episode 24 | Aired on 03.12.2012
But of course, the door swings open the second Spence touches it, and they stride right in, talkin' about hello hello and all the time in the dark there are the one billion dolls. Oh, man. They head down into the operating room, where Emily immediately spies a box full of those burlap voodoo dolls the old lady lied about. That's when the lights go out!
Emily: "Uh, maybe we should come back when they're open."
Spencer: "1979?"
Heh. They are thinking about bouncing ... when a terrifying robot baby voice starts up!
FOLLOW ME END UP LIKE ME FOLLOW ME END UP LIKE ME, it says. They -- for some reason -- choose to obey this advice, following the horrible voice deeper and deeper into the doll parts library stacks. This part was the worst! There's a doll with a head the size of a regular head, or like a nine-year-old boy's head, and when they pass by it, THE EYES FLICK OPEN AND STARE AT THEM!
My notes: seth's face inside a dolls face holy shit
The voice is issuing from a cabinet, which -- when opened -- reveals this fucked-up shrine to Alison's death, complete with a Chuckie in her shade half-buried in dirt, waving a shovel around and dancing, capering, twisting back and forth. It is by far the most amazing thing that has ever happened on this show, this whole episode. Then things get even more insane and the dolls start attacking! Jumping at them from the shelves! Bonking them! A monkey with cymbals! The shelves start falling over on top of them! Hanna snatches that laptop and books it!
My notes: what the fuc is evengoing on even
WICKED GAME
...Meanwhile, Aria and Ezra are having a calm, adult conversation about their relationship. It ends in lovemaking while a Chris Isaak cover plays, and a possible end to the affair.
PACKING UP
Emily: "What are you even tossing around looking for, exactly?"
Hanna: "I don't know! I'm just antsy! Fulla beans!"
Spencer: "Look, even Alison told me that there's something here the police can use."
Hanna: "Fucking excuse me? When was this?"
Spencer: "Um, yesterday."
Hanna: "Emily, are you hearing this shit?"
Emily: "Yeah, it happens. Didn't you also have that?"
Hanna: "That's right, when I got run over. I think we all may need professional help with our mental stuff after all."
Downstairs, they hear Melissa and Garrett, who are flirting about who gets to carry the box of one million blank thank you notes. It would seem they are dating -- or else this is his child and has been the whole time, even when he was dating Jenna -- but either way, they are super scary as a duo. They kiss, she offers him a beer, and then she explains how she's been scaring the piss out of Spencer since they were kids, and she knows Spence won't turn them in.