Episode Report Card Pamie: A | 151 USERS: C+ YOU GRADE IT And I Say: It's All Right
By Pamie | Season 3 | Episode 21 | Aired on 2003.05.13
Lorelai is on the phone, calling up the Yale financial aid office. It seems that she received a letter informing her that Rory isn't qualified to receive financial aid, since Lorelai recently came into a large sum of money. Lorelai explains that she already gave that money away to her parents because she owed it to them (Man, Chilton's expensive!) and now she doesn't have any of that money. So, how's that inn looking, Lorelai? Weren't you supposed to have bought that, like, yesterday? Anyway, Yale doesn't really care that Lorelai can't afford to send Rory to their school. Maybe it's because Lorelai tells Yale that Rory really wanted to get into Harvard, originally. Welcome to my world, Lor. A world without scholarships. A world that involves monthly student loan payments until the year 2008. Yeah, I still have five years to go. I will be in my thirties when I'm finished paying off the student loans I took out for two years of school. Of a state school. You'd better hope Rory becomes a doctor.
The closed captioning tells me that, as Jess is roaming the back streets of the Venice canals, the surfer "Catch a Wave" music is supposed to be on again. Luckily it's the more soothing strummy-strummy-la-la. If Neverwood's living on the Venice canals? He's not doing too bad for himself. Jess reads some ripped envelope that informs him which house Neverwood lives in. Oh, maybe that was the letter that Jess was reading in a voice-over that we didn't get to hear. No, that's not possible, unless Neverwood was writing the letter to Jess's mom. Because no matter how smart they want us to think Jess is, he wasn't reading books on the second day he was alive. I'm once again putting more thought into this than the writers did, so we'll move on. The front yard of Neverwood's house is huge. Six thousand dogs surge toward Jess, barking and yapping. Jess is protected by a tiny fence door. He calls out asking if anybody's home. From the roof, Sherilyn Fenn asks if Jess is selling something. I actually don't recognize her at first, and it's only once I'm instinctively searching for a mole on her face that I realize who she is. Jess asks if Jimmy Mariano lives there. Sherilyn Fenn asks if Jimmy owes him money. Jess almost says he's Neverwood's son, but the dogs, the dogs! One of the dogs is named Frodo. Sherilyn tries to speak Sherman-Palladino, but it's a clunky, sad thing. She gives a long monologue about the guard at Oz (not the show, the film) who only lets Dorothy in once there's a horse of a different color. Jess admits that he's Neverwood's son so that Sherilyn can say that's a horse of a different color. She tells him to come on in. He asks if the dogs bite. Sherilyn says that two of them do, but she doesn't say which two. "Which two, which two?!" Jess screams. Jess tells the dogs he will bite back. Man, this spinoff's gonna be lame. Sherilyn introduces herself as Sasha, which I will call her from now on because I'm embarrassed that Sherilyn Fenn, she of the "lipstick and compact," has been reduced to this non-Lynchian life. Sasha introduces all of the dogs by name. She says that Neverwood isn't here right now. Jess says he can just "hang around" and come back later. Sasha invites him in, and says she'll call Neverwood at work.