Episode Report Card Keckler: F | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Mehdalus
By Keckler | Season 4 | Episode 10 | Aired on 01.13.2005
In her father's quarters, Dani pulls out a big old needle and gives her father a shot in his big old humpy metallic-y spine. And as that's the most interesting thing about this episode, it's typical that they never bother to explain it. Transporter accident, yes, but what sort of accident turns a human spine into a Klingon spine? Dani doesn't like lying to Quantum about what they're doing. Emery doesn't care. Neither do I.
In the Armory, Reed and some other Rent-a-Red-Stripe hunt for wabbits. A wavy thing that looks very much like the anomalies in The Expanse zips around them. They chase it. For a really looooong time. The Rent-a-Red-Shirt gets enveloped by it and screams in agony. Yawn. Reed rushes to his side and shows us his melted face. Hey, that's exciting! Well, no, actually it isn't. He looks like one of the hoods in Dick Tracy.
T'Pol reports that the Rent-a-Red-Stripe is dead for various reasons, the biggest one being that his face got melted off. Emery plays dumb about the whole thing and really doesn't care. I sympathize. Emery goes off to get another epidural and I'm jealous because at least he'll be feeling something.
Dani and Emery argue some more about how dangerous their experiment is. Dani again insists on telling the truth that they're out there to bring Quinn back to life. Right here, I made the prediction that this episode would unfold just like all other Moral Dilemma episodes: a) the old man will die because b) there's always a price to pay in a Ruthless Quest, and c) that's even more true when some innocent redstripe has died as a result of that Ruthless Quest; furthermore, d) Quinn won't be brought back because you can't resurrect the dead -- especially not after fifteen years. A few months, even one year, yes, but fifteen? No. However, if you do manage to resurrect the dead, there's e) the Monkey's Paw Effect where you might not like what you get back. Because it's evil, or malformed, or the next Star Trek series. And now for The Most Depressing Thing About This Episode: my relatively dull and predictable hypothesis didn't even come true. What did come true was EVEN MORE BORING. Dani doesn't think they should go ahead with their tests if there's a chance of someone else dying. Emery believes it's highly unlikely someone else will die. Dani wonders how Quinn would feel about their decision. Emery tells her she can ask him in a few days when they get him back. Can she also ask him the best way to San Jose?
Trip helps Emery with more tests. Trip offers to treat Emery to lunch. Emery refuses. "He doesn't need to eat, he's a cyborg," Dr. Mathra suggests. Emery refuses all food because wants to monitor all the data coming back from their tests. Trip offers to be a second pair of eyes. "He already has a second pair of eyes. They're in his spine," Dr. Mathra explains. Emery again rebuffs him. Trip finally takes the hint that he's not needed or wanted, and leaves. I wish this show would take that hint.