Episode Report Card Al Lowe: A- | 2 USERS: A YOU GRADE IT Please Stand Up
By Al Lowe | Season 6 | Episode 18 | Aired on April 10, 2006
Lorelai sees her parents across the street on Maple Drive and fakes surprise at finding them there. Richard tries to come up with some reason that they're there, and Emily jumps in, saying that they're antiquing. Lorelai keeps the wide-eyed thing going, saying that they have awesome antique stores in Stars Hollow -- that Madison House is particularly good. Lorelai says that she can take them there right now. "Oh, uh..." both Grandparents respond. Emily says that they have an appointment to keep. They do a bad job of trying to cover, saying that they have a private appointment at an antiques store. "They're only expecting two of us," Richard says. Lorelai, still full of mock innocence, says that surely they won't mind if she comes along, especially if she promises not to break anything. They put her off again, saying that the appointment is not really for a while, which gives Lorelai the perfect moment to force their hands on making the ten-minute walk to Madison House with her. Lorelai now begins her Campaign of Denigration on Stars Hollow. She describes, to Richard and Emily's increasing horror, the bad traffic and how it surely won't be getting any better, as soon as they build that "big box store" in the middle of the town. "Those things are hideous," Richard declares, and Lorelai nods, telling them to hold their breath because of the sewer odor. Richard grows more concerned, saying that Lorelai needs to notify the public works department if there are sewer problems. "No," Lorelai says, "they're on strike. Well, they're always on strike." She coughs now, asking them to excuse her. "Allergies?" Emily asks. Lorelai shakes her head. "Meth lab." Very cute scene.
Philly. In Jess's store, one of his co-workers or co-owners or whatever is arguing that they need their own bar: "We need a public place where the next de Kooning can run into the next Franz Kline, and dis the next Jackson Pollock, while the next Charlie Parker shoots up in a corner." Jess slaps his arm: "Nice family place," he jokes. The guy, whose name is Matthew, continues his rant: "I'm not kidding. We'll call it 'Cedar Bar Redux.'" Jess is against it. "I would kick my own ass," he says, "if we called it that." Jess, Jess. Don't waste time kicking your own ass when so many people have volunteered to do it for you. Their other partner suggests that they call it "Devoid of Original Ideas Poseur Bar." Matthew gets pouty and stomps off, and Jess goes across the room to greet...