Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | 3 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT The God Of Small Things
By Jacob Clifton | Season 3 | Episode 10 | Aired on 12.04.2011
Alicia, verbatim: "You are making Scoffing and Chuckling Sounds!"
Martha: "I feel like Alicia's interruptions are throwing off Caitlin more than my various sounds."
Arbitrator: "Okay ladies! We don't want a catfight, do we?"
Oh shit. Sorry, Deb. This one just went to hell. (Luckily, you are a monumental douchebag, but we don't know that yet.)
Caitlin: "Why didn't you tell Deb that you were replacing her the next day?"
Provost: "I thought telling her we were downsizing was better than saying it was because her students hated her. Think of it as one last boundary-violating caress."
Arbitrator: Sustains an even dumber objection.
Caitlin: "Okay, fine, when did get these evaluations of Deb exactly? Because it was three days after you fired her. So."
Provost: "They weren't evaluations per se. More like bitching."
Caitlin: "Like because she was a Republican?"
Turns out the $35k cap only applies to sexual harassment, but if this is a civil rights deal, then there's no cap at all. Which... That's fucking awful, though, isn't it? How are they not the same thing? Martha calls Louis Canning, which is a good enough reason for the music to rush crazily into the credits.
ELI & DIANE
Eli's being weird and staring at a vent when Diane comes to see him. Seems that there is a hairline crack in the insulation, and he has perfect pitch, and almost was a concert pianist, and I guess Eli is going insane now.
Diane: "My parents wanted me to be a Senator."
Eli: "Your parents grew you in a lab to be a Senator."
Diane: "What are you doing in this conference room being all weird?"
Eli: "I am lonely. Nobody wants me ever since Cheese."
Diane: "See, people have jobs sometimes where they work for a living instead of being in here whistling at the air conditioning system. Why don't you let us throw you some work? I mean, Will hates the shit out of you almost entirely because you pretend you're this island of awesomeness in the middle of our crap lives. Help David Lee with this Congresswoman's divorce and that's like three birds, right there."
Eli: "Ugh, Good Wife Part II."
Diane: "Just do this for me. I'm sick of defending you at cocktail parties."
ARBITRATION
Grace & Zach: "Let's leave a message for mom so she knows where we are. Then go get brutally murdered."