Episode Report Card 3 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT Cinderella Story
By Wing Chun | Season 3 | Episode 17 | Aired on 02.29.2000
By candlelight, Joey gazes fondly at A.J., who is freaking out about his reading, now moments away. A woman steps up to the podium and introduces him; he mutters at Joey that he could still make a break for it, and then finally steps up and says, "Tonight I'm reminded of FDR's immortal words, 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.' Of course, FDR never stood up here." First of all, it's "We have nothing to fear but fear itself." Second, your trotting out your literary piddle from high-school isn't really a fearsome undertaking on a par with, say, ending the Great Depression. Third, no, FDR didn't ever stand behind that podium, because he had polio and was required to use a wheelchair. Fourth, SHUUUUT UUUUUUUUUP. Man, I can't even stand to tell you the content of A.J.'s crappy-ass story, except to say that it's about someone finding "love unspoken" where she least expected to, and that the love-object in the story likes to read the early Sunday New York Times, and that, as A.J. gets into it, he exchanges a meaningful look with a maternally beaming Morgan. Joey notes the meaningful look, and gets all tense and watchful. Dude, A.J. and Morgan SO deserve each other. Just put a damn sweater on over that impractical-for-March-in-Boston strappy chiffon dress and go back to Capeside already.
Maybe Pacey goes to the Capeside Mentoring Program office and complains about how much Buzz sucks, and maybe the head of the program tells him that Buzz has already been through three other mentors, and that because his father left him, Buzz has a need to test people in his life to see if they'll stay, and that he's got the highest IQ in his class but is failing, and that this inspires Pacey to try again to Make A Difference in Buzz's life. Or maybe we see Darrill's legs flailing about on the ground and a metal garbage can over his head. At first all we see is the can being pounded by many hockey sticks, and hear that the "Fight! Fight! Fight!" chant has been taken up again with renewed vigour. As the camera pulls back, we see that John has joined the knot of hockey-playing kids in kicking the crap out of Darrill.
Dawson messes around in the kitchen. Gale tells him that she's very angry with him, and that he had no right to tell The Flash that she needed help. Dawson says, "But Mom, you do." Gale asks where Dawson got "a ridiculous idea like that," and he mentions everything that we've already seen go wrong so far -- the lack of a competent chef, the problems the wait staff is experiencing, blah blah blah...oh, all right, "fishcakes." You know they're on the menu. Dawson complains that Gale put him in charge of tasks he isn't qualified to oversee, and she tells him that calling in her ex-husband isn't the solution. Dawson reminds her that she and The Flash had told her more than once how important it was to them that they remain friends, and that her anger now is confusing him. She asks him rhetorically whether he wants people to tell him how to direct his movies, and then answers her own question by saying that what he wants are people to act in them; she says that this is her career now, and that she thought he of all people would understand that. Dawson snots, "Well, excuse me for not wanting to see you fail, Mom." He tells her that the one thing (uh, nice) she'd ever taught him was not to be too proud to ask for help, and that he doesn't know why she can't take her own advice. He then hikes up his size 28 jeans in order to free up his feet, and stomps out. Gale bites her lip.