Episode Report Card Couch Baron: A | 2148 USERS: B YOU GRADE IT Bertram is Evil. Evil!
By Couch Baron | Season 3 | Episode 7 | Aired on 2009.09.27
...and then we're back to him looking at himself in the mirror the next morning, obviously having landed on his face. He picks up a note from the girl thanking him for the "help" and saying that they left him his car, adding, "Your welcome." Heh. Stay in school, kids! It can keep you out of the Army and prevent you from making grammatical mistakes in front of large audiences! Don opens his wallet and finds one whole dollar inside, which I'm guessing is not what was there when he arrived, and he disgustedly heads into the bathroom...
...just as Peggy sits up in bed again. Duck asks if everything's okay, but when she says she's worried about Housekeeping disturbing them, he says he put out the Do Not Disturb sign. "I'll call them when we're done." I guess there's no need to announce his randier intentions again, given that she's already naked and in bed. Might not hurt his case to repeat the part about the go-around, though. He adds that he loves the morning, which I'm guessing is a new development in his life now that he's sober. They get to it...
...while Betty's decorator is completely horrified at the monstrosity now sitting where the hearth should be. On the plus side, the chances of it catching on fire at some point are pretty decent. She tells Betty she's ruined the whole room, and if she wants to keep it, "please do not tell people I did this." I'd get her to sign something to that effect, honey, because that thing is beastly.
Peggy sees Don the next morning and is shocked at his appearance, which he blames on a fender-bender. She asks if he'd like some coffee, presumably in an attempt to show him she doesn't think so much of herself, but he brusquely refuses. Don, I know you're not in the best mood this episode, especially right at the moment, but please consider GIVING PEGGY A FUCKING BREAK. The viewing audience will appreciate it. After he gives Allison the same explanation, she tells him Bertram is waiting for him. Inside, he finds the man in question, sitting in Don's chair much as Connie did, so you know he means business. After a little story about Sacagawea, Bertram informs Don thusly: "You, Don, have been standing on someone's shoulders. We brought you in, we nurtured you like family, and now's the time to pay us back." Don stares at Bertram sullenly, like a petulant child would, which feels about right, and Bertram adds that he can't go any further on his own. Bertram then produces another copy of the contract and a pen, and asks this: "Would you say I know something about you, Don?" Oooooh. You know, on first viewing, I thought he was being completely evil, but I'm not really feeling any venom here; I'm more inclined to take him at his word that he's merely reminding Don of how well he's been treated, in many senses, and telling him it's time to come along for the ride. Don's the one who's making it into such a trap in his own mind, and Bertram's basically telling him to get over it as he adds, "After all, when it comes down to it, who's really signing this contract anyway?" Okay, I'll admit that was a little evil. Bravo, Robert Morse. I was hoping they kept you around for a reason. Don signs and dates (7-23-1963) the contract, taking some measure of revenge by telling Bertram he wants no further contact with Roger...