Episode Report Card Pamie: D | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Changes
By Pamie | Season 3 | Episode 6 | Aired on 11.28.1999
Nelle isn't interested in John's weirdness. She wants to know what his problem is but she doesn't really want to know because she keeps whining and "Oh, come on!"-ing. John is upset that everyone thinks he's a funny little man. "People don't think that," Nelle says, which of course cues Ling to walk in and ask her to come talk to her when she's done talking with the funny little man. Not since Three's Company have we seen such flawless executions of comedic timing. John says he can tolerate being ridiculed anywhere but in the courtroom. That's where people fear him. That's his one haven. He doesn't like getting laughed at. Nose whistle.
Bulldog is still talking in that courtroom about how people organized the Blue Flu. Billy interrupts to say he doesn't want to hear a speech from the witness. The witness does some sort of "Nanny-nanny-boo-boo" retort. He admits to Billy that he called Mrs. Jones a nymph and a slut and that they were trying to save the pedigree of the magazine. They called in sick knowing that she had the right to fire them. Billy and Mrs. Jones fast-forward to the secret side room where he tells her that he got them up to a hundred. She says that she doesn't want to settle. Billy tells her that the last point was a good one. Sexual harassment cases are about power struggles and in this case she had the power to fire the ones who were calling in sick and she didn't, so there isn't a problem of power here. "Don't talk to me like I'm a child," Mrs. Jones says, which makes me giggle, because I think everyone talks to Farrah like she's a child. She goes on to say they admitted calling her a whore on record. Billy says they also have her stating that she had sex with an eighty-six-year-old man, and what the hell does that say? Mrs. Jones asks for Billy's opinion. Here it is. "Snort! Snort! Snort! Grunt! Crotch scratch! Make me dinner, woman!" When you read the closed captioning, however, it says something about how women are abusing the sexual harassment laws so they can do whatever they want. They can sleep with rich old men to get money and power and blah, blah, blah, bleachcakes. "You're a male chauvanist pig!" Mrs. Jones says. "Card-carrying and proud of it," Billy says as if he was calling himself rubber and her glue. He wants her to settle. God, his tie is ugly. It's shimmering in my television screen. Mrs. Jones asks if he's going to get behind her in this case. "As opposed to being on top of you?" Cue the slap. In my world this is followed by a kick to the groin and a brand new lawsuit, but David's running things around here, so you know...well, I don't want to ruin anything. Mrs. Jones says she doesn't owe him an explanation about why she was seeing the old man, but she does anyway of course, and tells him that she loved the old coot. She wants to know if Billy is capable of defending this case. He says that the jury won't see anything but total commitment. Mrs. Jones says at least one of them is able to fake it for money. She calls him a pig again (Can we come up with a new word, David? How about "idiot," "waste of matter," "moron," "asshole?" "bastard?"). She leaves as Billy gives a self-satisfied smirk as if he just smelled one of his own farts as we fade to black.