Episode Report Card Djb: B- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT The Real Slim Shady
By Djb | Season 4 | Episode 4 | Aired on 07.10.2004
Sitting on their couch, Keith frets to David that "it's weird at work." He feels like he's "fifteen years old all over again," which at least means that it looks like he'll be invited to have sex with that other security guard as long as there aren't any cameras present. David sympathizes with Keith for being trapped in a culture where he feels he can't come out, but nevertheless tells him he has to come out. Keith says that it's "his decision," and David's point that Keith has turned into a "self-loathing homo" is then conveniently proven when the phone rings and Keith tears the phone out of David's hands with an embarrassed "I'll get that." Keith gets a meeting time and a coffee order for the following morning, but David is more concerned about the fact that he can't answer the phone in his own house, turning to the answering machine and pushing a button, yelling, "You've reached David and Keith, but we can't come to the phone right now because we're too gay." I'm just impressed he knew the right button to change the outgoing message without even consulting the manual. If I tried to make that grand a point in front of my lovah, the machine would be all, "Message alert off, message alert on, message alert off" and I'd be all, "I don't even know what that means" before storming off in a huff anyway.
Brenda and Joe sit on Brenda's couch as Nate drinks a beer and explains something cute Maya did and how it made him think of death. Joe hits his generic-guy marks without a problem, noting that "Parenthood is such a huge fucking responsibility," but what on earth else could he say considering the circumstances? ["This scene was also amusing to me because it totally dramatized the way parents -- even ones who haven't just lost their spouses tragically -- think everything their babies do is as interesting to their single friends as it is to themselves. Note to parents: it ain't." -- Wing Chun] Nate continues his congressional filibuster of the damned, telling them, "I still feel like Lisa is around, pushing me to move on, wants me to. But you can't. Can't rush it." He takes a swig of Bud as the others sit in silence, and Nate realizes in this moment that the reason he spends so much damn time by himself is because nobody can stand to be anywhere near him. Even his daughter. Who is a baby of unlimited needs. She'll just forage on her own, thanks. Nate tells them it's time for him to take his leave, Brenda asks him if he's okay to drive, and Nate tells them he is, adding, "I can't believe I was the only one drinking. You guys made me feel like such a lowlife." He goes, and Joe immediately notes that Nate is "seriously wounded," suggesting that they outfit him with one of those dog collars that prevents him from chewing on his stitches. Brenda apologizes for not being able to turn Nate away, and Joe tells her that it's fine because he really enjoyed being tied up "like a Christmas ham" when Brenda's ex-boyfriend decided on the pop-in. I think he totally means that, actually.