Episode Report Card Niki: A | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT The Second Time Around
By Niki | Season 2 | Episode 22 | Aired on 05.01.2001
Rick, meanwhile, is feeling the crunch as he and his accountant, Arnold, go over the numbers again. Arnold breaks the news: Rick's down to about $30,000. Judging by Rick's face, Arnold may also have kicked him in the groin, but I couldn't see it under the table. Arnold tosses out the fairly unattractive option of borrowing from Rick's pension fund, but makes it clear that doing so is fraught with peril and high interest payments. He then suggests that Rick needs to reevaluate things: "This wedding, for instance." Rick's hackles rise, and he points out that he and Lily are splitting the cost of the wedding. "Did you ever hear of City Hall?" Arnold asks, only half joking. ["Word." -- Wing Chun] Rick immediately shames him for suggesting such a thing, letting Arnold know that Lily stuck by him through the whole Atlantor ordeal as if it were an everyday event, and that "she deserves better than City Hall." Arnold says, "Sorry, forget I said anything," and sips his coffee. Rick stares at him as if something's dawning, and asks whether he speaks Hebrew. Arnold is slightly taken aback, and says that he doesn't, really. Rick asks whether his wedding vows were in Hebrew. "My entire marriage has been in Hebrew," Arnold deadpans. Then he gently adds, "No one is saying don't get married. Maybe just a little less wedding." Rick knows he's right, but hates to admit it.
Later that night, in bed with Lily, he pauses from reading his book and says, "Maybe we shouldn't have hot hors d'oeuvres." Lily stops writing in her book and says, "What?" Rick tries to explain that he thinks people will just fill up on them and then not be hungry for dinner. Lily's nonplused. He hesitantly asks, "Is it too late to cancel?" Lily strains to keep her voice mild, and tells him that it's not too late to cancel anything. He asks what she's reading. She holds up her book, Weddings for Complicated Families. Lily asks what he's reading. "Wood Chipper Murders," Rick answers nonchalantly, and then murmurs, "Guy killed his wife, stuffed her in the wood chipper." Lily glances over at him, slightly alarmed by his choice in bedtime reading materials. She mutters, "Must've ordered hot hors d'oeuvres." Engrossed, Rick doesn't hear her, but she won't repeat herself because you never know when that mild-mannered guy you're in bed with is going to pull out the chipper. She sighs and says that, according to her book, they're behind on everything for the wedding.
Soliloquy Lily reads from the tome, which I find utterly ridiculous. The book, not her reading. If I ever buy a book like that, somebody do me a favor and beat me black and blue with it before returning it for a full refund. Thanks. Anyway, Lily reads, "One week before wedding, double-check with photographer. Have alterations completed on dress. Win over future stepchildren." She lowers the book and confesses that she just made up the last one.