Episode Report Card Lady Lola: C- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT A Whirlwind of Stupid
By Lady Lola | Season 3 | Episode 20 | Aired on 10.16.2011
Andy asks how long it will take long to pay back $8 million. Teresa say she's not sure of the exact timeline. Andy: "You should look into that." Ha! Teresa insists Juicy is working and goes so far as to claim that Joe got his start by watching Juicy at work. Melissa says those kinds of assertions make Joe very upset (because they deny any credit to his own enterprising spirit). On a roll, Teresa also claims that Rich got into investment property because of Juicy. Kathy tells her, "Don't go there. Don't. Zip it." Melissa brings up some family drama where Teresa tried to cut off Rich so he wouldn't be as successful as her family. Teresa once again dismisses her with her eye-rolling, fake-smiling, "Okaaaaaay." She insists that her husband was the go-to guy for business advice and was nothing short (no pun intended) of helpful and generous with his time and knowledge. Nothing that we have seen over the last several years bears that out, but whatevs. Melissa snarks, "Basically anything good that anyone has ever done comes from Teresa and Joe." Indeed, I suspect that's how Teresa sees it!
On to legal matters: Andy brings up Juicy's arrest for obtaining a fraudulent driver's license in March. If convicted, says Andy, Juicy could face 18 months to 10 years in the clink. Is Teresa worried? Yes and no, she says, insisting Juicy didn't do anything. Of the fraud lawsuit, Teresa was cleared, but Juicy was ordered to pay $260,000. Teresa says he's paid in full and declines to comment further.
Caroline expels a whole mouth full of disgruntled air, and Andy asks her about her quizzical look. She says simply, "I'm quizzical," and notes that there are some puzzling elements to Teresa's affairs. Teresa: "Who cares what Caroline thinks?" Caroline: "Well, Andy for starters." Teresa tries to deflect by claiming, "I'm confused about The Brownstone," but it's totally unnoticed. They keep talking over one another until Caroline wonders why Teresa is poised to fight. Teresa says, "I'm calm and cool like a whistle." Caroline finally calls her out for being defensive. Andy's all, "Cool like a whistle?" Ha! Andy literally looks at the camera in confusion as Teresa says she doesn't want to hear what Caroline's saying. Caroline tells her to plug her ears. Double ha!
Caroline says she feels like she's getting dumber by the minute. And I quote, "I am in a whirlwind of stupid." She thinks she and everyone else in the room besides Teresa would be better served to plug their own ears and "La la la" while Teresa spins her bullshit stories. Several beats behind, Teresa tells Caroline, "You should take your own advice." Caroline agrees, saying she should have taken her own advice two years ago when she thought it would be best to get Teresa out of her life. She shrugs her eyebrows all, "Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Giudice."