Episode Report Card Keckler: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Jane's Addiction
By Keckler | Season 3 | Episode 19 | Aired on 04.20.2004
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.After relatively little deliberation, the Xindi decide to stop beating up Quantum and return him to his ship in a body bag. Well, it's not exactly a body bag, as UPN would have had us think all week, it's more a body pod. At any rate, he's alive, okay? Right, so then they run into these other aliens who aren't as hard up for walls, floors, and ceilings as the crew of the Enterprise are, but the aliens, though fairly nice, won't help them out, see? So, Quantum debates and debates and decides to relieve the aliens of their warp coil so he can rendez-vous with their new BFF Degra. Meanwhile, T'Pol is playing the crack whore fairly convincingly as she risks life and logic for a hit of the Trellium-D she's been free-basing since God knows when. Phlox puts her on a detox program and promises not to tattle to the captain. In other news, Mayweather and Hoshi have nice so-brief-if-you-breathe-you'll-miss-it moment in which they discuss piano lessons; Reed and Trip play back-up guitar; and T'Pol has a weird wet dream about Trip. And by wet dream, I mean that they're actually in a shower. Getting wet. But it's hot, so it's wet in that way, too. Reportedly. Want more? The full recap starts right below!
Previously on Enterprise, T'Pol freaks out, Quantum sacrifices himself for the cheese grater good, and the ship looks like a piece of Emmenthaler.Hey, they're picking up exactly where they left off -- that's pretty cool. Basically, the ship is still falling apart. There's smoke, fire, and a mess I wouldn't want to clean up. Just as Reed screams, "We cahn't take much more of this!" they don't. The firing stops, and the attacking ships bug out of their airspace. Ironically, Enterprise can't do the same because their thrusters are down.
I laugh in a very sinister way at the thought of Sara M handling this song next week.
The Xindi yell at each other. Again. Some more. Snake Eyes is pissed that Degra, the other Mr. Man, and Three-Toed called off the attack on Enterprise. They argue. Degra wants Quantum released so the Xindi of the Round Table can question him later. Snake Eyes isn't so keen on that. Degra wins. Snake Eyes offers to escort Quantum home. Degra isn't so keen on that. They argue. Three-Toed lets it be known that the Xindi of the Round Table want the Aquamen to transport Quantum. And just how are they going to do that, exactly? Won't they drown him? Or suffocate themselves?
I see a few names here in the credits -- David A. Goodman and Chris Black -- who aren't there any more, according to my TrekThroat. It's sad.
A small vessel flies over Enterprise. Is that Quantum already?
Inside the wreck of the Hesperus, Reed tells T'Pol everything that's wrong. I see -- that was a sh'pod, checking out the damage. Makes sense. The destroyed corridors are dark, lit only by the sparks from constant welding. They're basically up a certain creek without a certain instrument. In Engineering, more bad news: the primary warp coil is fried like all of Trip's favorite foods and has to be rebuilt from scratch. Aw, come on, get Sandra Lee in there and I'm sure she could whip up a Semi-Homemade warp coil. With glitter! On a fondant-smeared tablescape! And in the background, she'd have a KitchenAid mixer the color of warp that never gets used! Sadly, without Wal-Martha Stewart, the rebuild would take three weeks if they had the parts. Which they don't. And there's not even a Michael's nearby! Trip says he'll get to work on fixing the impulse engines as long as T'Pol can assign some more hands to Engineering. Something catches fire; it gets put out. Trip doesn't think Engineering's the safest place to be. "Indeed, we've already lost one captain today," Reed agrees as he escorts T'Pol out. Aw, he's like her bodyguard.
A bloody Quantum comes to on the floor somewhere. He looks out a glass window into yellow (yellow?!) water. Maybe the Aquamen need to get a sign made that says, "Welcome to our OOL. Notice there's no 'P' in it." He bangs on the glass. Dude, you're not supposed to do that! It gives them, like, headaches, or something. An Aquaman swims into view. Now he's gonna get it. Quantum wants to know what's going on. Aquaman pushes a button on his side of the window. Quantum collapses back into unconsciousness. See? Idiot.