Episode Report Card M. Giant: B+ | 2 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT I'm Ready For My Hinky-Ass Close-Up!
By M. Giant | Season 5 | Episode 5 | Aired on 07.03.2005
Back at the funeral home, Faux-mar Sharif's brothers, previously united in their support of cremation, have suffered a schism over the funeral music. One brother yells over blasting polka music that Frankie Yankovic was Faux-mar's favorite, and the other yells that Faux-mar's favorite was…wait for it…Herbie Hancock. And he stops the tape and pops in "Rock It." (That is not what I meant at all. / That is not it, at all.) Nate suggests that maybe Faux-mar had two favorites. "You ever think of that?" He stops the tape and says he himself has at least three favorite songs, and that Maya's favorite color is blue and green. "So here's what we're gonna do: we're gonna play Frankie Yankovic and Herbie Hancock. How's that?" Both brothers fold their arms, each annoyed at being denied a full victory. Or maybe they're just worried about what that playlist is going to sound like. Obviously they've never heard of Jack FM.
The restaurant Claire's at with Ma Chenowith is considerably more chi-chi than the one where she met Billy. Ma is trying to backpedal on the sales job she gave Claire, even though Claire insists that Ma implied there was an emergency. Ma says that Billy could hurt himself again like he has in the past, and Claire says that's not her problem. Ma says, "I understand, given the family you come from, why you ended it." Claire correctly says her family has nothing to do with it. And then she stares in horror as Ma displays way too much knowledge of her and Billy's sex life. "He told you about our sex?" Claire asks in disbelief. Ma says, as only Ma can, "Of course he did! I'm his mother." She insists that Claire made Billy happier than he'd been since he was, "I don't know, four?" Claire says they're both better off apart, and Ma becomes all business: "What do you need from him to make this work?" Claire's acts offended, and Ma says she thinks Billy and Claire still love each other. Claire looks at her empty plate and tries to figure out how to get out of this.
Nate comes home to find Brenda and Maya cooking. He asks his wife if he can help with anything. Brenda says, "Yeah, you can not act like an a-hole tonight at dinner." Nate asks why he would act like an a-hole. "Because you were an a-hole last night," Brenda explains. I just think the word a-hole is funny, because I'm twelve. Brenda elaborates that Maya's not just his daughter any more. "Do you know how offensive that was?" Rather than apologizing, Nate asks to "put a pin in this," and Brenda snaps "Fine" as the phone rings. We only hear Nate's end of the conversation, but it's pretty clear that it's Maggie, asking if she can bring George. Since, you know, Ruth bailed on making his dinner and the man can't figure out how to make a damn sandwich or something for himself. Brenda reacts with annoyance. "What, was I supposed to say no to her?" Nate demands. No, Nate, your wife would never ask you to say no to your girlfriend.