Episode Report Card Keckler: C- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Unfrozen Caveman Captain
By Keckler | Season 3 | Episode 3 | Aired on 09.23.2003
What Jake 2.0 gets wrong about the NSA could fill another Bamford book.
Bridge. Trip pretty much refuses the other captain's offer to storm his ship. They argue a bit about whether or not he's going to "neutralize the infected organism." Finally, Trip thunders with a completely smooth brow, "Look, we've only been dealing with this virus for one day so forgive me if I don't take your word for it that they only option is to neutralize our Tactical Officer! You wanna come over to discuss the situation, fine. But if you try to force your way onto this ship, you're going to have one helluva fight on yer hands!" "Well, except for the fact that you just told him that your Tactical Officer was the one infected. I mean, hello? Operational security! You don't go around leaking that kind of information to a potential enemy. Ass!" the Evil Dr. Mathra says, replacing the Harassed Dr. Mathra now that he suddenly has more time to interfere with my recapping.
Planet. It's daylight, and Loathe-ar sneaks through some catacombs. He enters a room that has several recesses with top-lit pieces of pottery. So, what? This is their own weird Visitor's Center? Loathe-ar creeps further in, and the view opens up to the Map Room from Raiders of the Lost Ark, except fake-looking. Loathe-ar must have amazing vision, because we get close-ups of some of the buildings that are clearly miles away from where he's standing. Loathe-ar sinks to his knees but then jumps as a normal Quantum comes around a pillar and looks at him. Loathe-ar jerks awake from his bed of tree logs in the dark jungle. "How loooong. Was. I. Asleeeep?" Loathe-ar asks T'Pol, who is sitting nearby. I'm sorry, I know people hate "Masks," but I much prefer Data's "lamb moussaka is coming" to Bakula's Yoda-cum-Golluming. T'Pol tells him he's only been snoring for a few minutes, and Loathe-ar calls up to Hill Person Hoshi (who drops out of a tree) that he saw "it" in his dream. "Urquat?" Hill Person Hoshi asks. "Our city!" Loathe-ar confirms. T'Pol contradicts them, saying that there aren't any cities on the planet. Loathe-ar says the city is below the surface, filled with a bunch more Hill People waiting for them. T'Pol tries to remind Loathe-ar of his humanity and of his mission to drag down ratings. Loathe-ar doesn't believe her and drags her off. Hill Person Hoshi follows.
Sickbay. The alien captain of the other ship doesn't believe Phlox's promise that the decon chamber is sealed. The alien captain tells him that the virus infected tens of millions of people on his homeworld: "They all had to be destroyed." Trip's agog at the word "destroyed," and the captain explains that the virus would have transformed the whole population within a matter of weeks. The captain goes on to say that the virus was engineered by the natives of the planet, the Loque'eque. Something decimated the species centuries ago, and they couldn't reproduce, so they created the virus to transform other species into their own in order to save themselves from extinction. "Ingenious," Phlox comments, "but why didn't they program the virus to stop replicating once their population was replenished?" The captain says they've been trying to answer that question for a long time. Answering Trip's next question, the captain tells him that the virus makes all of those infected want to return to their home city, Urquat, and that's why they can't allow the virus to spread. Other infected species would return to this planet, and the epidemic would get out of control again. The captain gets a comm from his ship that they've detected three more infected bio-signs on the planet. "Prepare a containment team," the captain says. "More of your crewmen?" I'll bet "containment team" is code for "pastry chefs whose specialty is Alien Brulée." Phlox says that one of their crew on the planet has an immunity to the virus, so if he could just take a look at the captain's past research, maybe they could work together. The captain ignores him; they will do the "examining" on their own and let them know. Trip would prefer that Phlox do the examining, but the other captain doesn't give two hoots what Trip prefers. He's under orders to contain the virus by any means necessary. The captain walks off and tells the Starfleet security guard to take him to the airlock. Trip nods his assent, and the two leave. Phlox says that if they don't develop an antivirus by the end of the episode, it will be too late, and there won't be enough of the humans' original genomes to reconstruct them, or the viewers' interest. Trip realizes they can't use a sh'pod because the other ships would detect it, and wonders if T'Pol's infected. Phlox thinks it's a certainty. Trip rules out the transporter. "Whatever you do, Commander, do it quickly, I need that DNA sample!" Phlox says, and a GE 25-watt soft-light bulb appears above Trip's head. He tears off through corridors to T'Pol's cabin. Trip finds the peaches and examines them for the half-eaten one, as May-You-Snooze-You-Lose comms that the other ship has launched a sh'pod. "Keep an eye on 'em!" Trip shouts, and runs back.