Episode Report Card Couch Baron: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT You Never Forget Your First Time
By Couch Baron | Season 2 | Episode 6 | Aired on 08.16.1998
Pancamo gets wheeled into the infirmary, still unconscious, as Schibetta lies next to him, awake but eyes closed. Yeah, a lot of people aren't happy with their first experience, but this one does seem particularly bad. In the doorway, Burruano tells Glynn that Schibetta's rectum was bleeding. Well, that's a new twist on "ridden hard and put away wet." Apparently, Schibetta's claiming not to remember what happened. Glynn: "He knows. He's too ashamed to admit he took one up the ass." Glynn, you may not actually do anything as the warden, but I couldn't have said it better myself. Immediately trying to prove me wrong, Glynn says he's going to fire the hack that let this happen. You go, girlfriend. Once Glynn's gone, Burruano approaches Schibetta and tells him the family has decided that someone with less experience with anal sex will be taking over operations in Oz. Schibetta nods, but asks Burruano not to tell his father. Oh, he saw the whole thing from above, Petey, and believe me, he's not going to be able to look Adebisi's dad in the eye for a while. Burruano pats Schibetta's arm as he notes the marbles falling out of his ear.
In the main area, Alvarez is gleefully telling Guerra about Schibetta's mental state. When he sees Adebisi, he pops up to be all buddy-buddy, but Adebisi completely blows him off, saying he didn't do anything to help with the Schibetta situation, and considering that Alvarez probably had plenty of opportunity to kill him in the infirmary, I see his point. Alvarez's face falls faster than an overcooked soufflé. Guerra asks how Alvarez can let Adebisi keep disrespecting him, and I have to say I see his point as well. Oh, Miguel, your looks only get you so far with me. Specifically, they get you to Season Two, Episode 6. In the gym, Guerra gets into it with some Aryan or biker, who punches him. Guerra goes all glass-eyed, which is nice, since the guy clocked him but good. In the cafeteria, Guerra says he wants to kill the guy. Tip of the day: Bring a weapon. Alvarez says he won't, but Guerra asks what it will take for them to go to war. Alvarez looks unhappy.
By way of an answer, we're in a prisoner flashback. It's El Cid. Oh, yeah. In a vacant lot, he finishes a cigarette as two of his henchmen hold another guy prisoner. El Cid picks up a long wooden pole and runs the guy through. Yeah -- three guys and a weapon against one is the way to do it. Preparation's the key, or it'll be Preparation H. (And to quote Miss Alli, [THUNK.]) "Prisoner Number 98H498, Raoul Hernandez, a.k.a. El Cid." Murder two, 36 years, parole in 20. Hernandez gets Alvarez as his sponsor. Alvarez says it's an honor, but Hernandez tells him he's too white to be Latino, and to get out of his face. Hey Migs, did AOL Time Warner take you over? Inside, El Cid greets the other Latinos, one of whom, I feel obligated to point out, is every bit as pale as Alvarez. Alvarez looks on, concerned.