Episode Report Card Keckler: B- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT The Importance of Being Earnest Borgnine
By Keckler | Season 2 | Episode 23 | Aired on 05.06.2003
You know that whole having a queen and living in a hive thing the Borg have going on? Well, does that mean that every time any of the collective comes back to report on the assimilation of a new species, they have to do a little butt-waggling dance so the rest of the hive knows the location of the planet?
Sick Bay. One of the Tarkaleans starts to wake up and freak out. Phlox decides to sedate him, but the Tarkalean starts a fight instead. The other Tarkalean jumps up and tosses a few of the security guards aside. The first Tarkalean injects Phlox's neck with two Borg wires and throws him across the room. The Tarkaleans escape up a shaft.
Blackness. Multiple voices whisper. Quantum's voice penetrates. Phlox opens his eyes. That was pretty cool. Quantum helps Phlox to his feet as Phlox explains that they were attacked. Phlox scans himself and quietly says that he's been infected with the nanoprobes. "One of the aliens injected me with some sort of...tubules," Phlox says. Aw, he sounds so upset. Last night? John Billingsley and I got married. Reed shows Quantum how the Tarkaleans escaped, and Quantum orders all maintenance shafts sealed off, with guards posted at every access point. "When you find them, put them in Decon, maximum security!" Quantum orders. Isn't he precious -- thinking they're actually going to apprehend the Borg. What childlike innocence mixed with colossal torpidity of mental functions he has. In a voice breaking with emotion, Phlox cautions Reed that the Borgaleans are very strong: "It's critical that you don't let them touch you!" Phlox scans a security officer and tells him he hasn't been infected. The security guard thanks him in a British (?) accent, and Quantum whisper-orders him to stay with Phlox. "Understood," the security officer responds in a definitely British accent. Quantum furrows at Phlox's turned back. "Call the Bridge if you need anything," Quantum offers. Phlox slowly turns around and says his Edosian slugs might like some boiled rootleaf. "I usually pick some up from the galley, but under the circumstances…" Phlox trails off. Quantum touches his doctor on the arm and assures him he'll have some sent down. That's mighty big of him -- why doesn't he bring it down his own damn self?
Bowels of ship. The Borgaleans fiddle with the ship.
Engineering. In a trying-to-be-ironic-but-failing-miserably parallel, Trip is telling Quantum how the Borgumans modified the Arctic vessels, but since the majority of us out there already know what the Borg can accomplish when they put their minds to it, I'm not going into the same amount of excruciating and REPETITIVE detail. Quantum notes that not all the aft-plating has been modified, and comes up with a plan to shoot the Arctic ship and disable it. T'Pol reports that she's located the Arctic ship, travelling at warp four-point-eight. The plate of anvil pasta tells me that they better hurry up or the Borgumans will soon upgrade that warp speed to one beyond that which Enterprise is capable. Quantum orders May-XX go find the Arctic ship, and asks Trip to "coax a little more power out of the engines." As he leaves, Quantum hopes the Borgumans haven't had time to upgrade their weapons.
Reed searches for the Borgaleans. The Borgaleans tamper with more of the ship's systems. Reed finds the Borgaleans tampering, and commands them to stop or else he'll shoot. They don't stop. Reed shoots. After the first shot, the Borgalean barely sways in reaction. Reed orders his security team to kick their weapons up a notch to maximum. They fire again. This time, the lasers don't even get a reaction out of the Borgalean. Although there's none of that cool squared-off shielding either. They try a few more shots, and the Borgalean advances on them. Reed orders his team to fall back. The second Borgalean finds them and beats them up. The Borgalean starts to do some assimilating on one of the security team, but Reed conks him on the head with his gun and knocks him out. The security team escapes unassimilated. Reed contacts the Bridge, reporting the location of the Borgaleans and the fact that they were fiddling around with a portion of the ship.