Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT A Message From the Ministry Of Awesome
By Jacob Clifton | Season 4 | Episode 16 | Aired on 02.06.2003
Noranti hurries up to the fat Sephora lady. "How could I possibly serve you?" Heh. Noranti mentions a Nebari girl, yay high, "kind of gray," and the woman calls to Chiana's masseuse. "Another one?" Chiana comes out with her and Noranti grabs Chiana. "We have to go!" She hustles Chiana toward the pod, and Chiana's like, "Are you frelled?" Noranti nods: they all are. She tells them about Grayza and Braca, the spa chicks listening in. Chiana tries to comm Aeryn -- I love that they're each other's point of contact, family, not Noranti or Sikozu, still -- and just gets static. Noranti remembers about the PKs and they rush off, the blonde women watching them go. They quickly come on some Commandos telling some vendors about how if they see a Nebari female around, they need to rat them out immediately. Why they would say that, on the off-chance that they're in a Farscape episode and going to run into the Moya crew, I do not know. It does occur to me, though, that because Chiana's Nebari, and the Nebari don't really get out much because they are the Borg, she's the most visible person in the crew. I never thought about that before. How lonely.
Chiana turns on a dime and takes Noranti back to Sephora, asking for transformation. "Full genetic modification. Good enough to pass a DNA scan." Marella's like, "But you have to pick" and whatever, and they are in a hurry, and that whole thing goes on for awhile -- Chiana asks for bigger boobs, hilariously -- and Noranti agrees with her that eyes would be good too. (Eyes, not ears, note. She hasn't used her power since I started recapping, but she's still terrified of blindness.) Finally, Chiana's like, "Seriously, whatever," and just heads back into the booth. Marella takes Chiana back and the other one smiles at Noranti. By changing their bodies, they can make the PKs blind.
A Scarran stands around the dead Leviathan's empty Pilot console, sniffing for trouble. Braca approaches, assuring him they're secure. The groups coalesce and talk smack about who's better equipped to patrol and make things safe; the Scarran returns to sniffing.
Aeryn and Sikozu find a bolthole just above the Pilot's den and fight over the binoculars, which also magnify sound. Sikozu won't hand them over just yet. Grayza and the Scarran woman greet each other, and Sikozu gasps. "That is War Minister Ahkna. Third in rank in the Scarran fleet." Aeryn goes, "Wow." Ahkna and Grayza intimidate each other about the nature of trust and it's all very hardcore and fun, wartime diplomacy and fronting. (Riggs and Buller had a lot of fun rehearsing these scenes, but they did them in makeup, so later on they didn't recognize each other even though they'd been working together all week. I love that.) The Scarrans all act creepy and Ahkna smiles: "You've been conditioned to resist Scarran mind-probing." Grayza nods: "We all have." Sikozu gets really annoying up above, all, "Ohhh, ooooh," but not telling Aeryn anything useful. Grayza and Ahkna accuse each other of being timewasters, and Grayza finally levels: "As I communicated, I want peace." Ahkna's like, "Everybody wishes for that at Christmas, but we're here to deal." Grayza...fully offers her the Luxan Territories! Damn, she's cold. Sikozu goes crazy and Aeryn's like, "Seriously, bitch."