Episode Report Card Gwen: D | 1 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT Car Wash
By Gwen | Season 3 | Episode 1 | Aired on 10.24.1999
In a room or antechamber somewhere in the vicinity of the church, Ally stands with her hands over here ears and her eyes squeezed shut while the parents of the bride and groom yell at her. Reesa's yelling, too. Joel's just standing around some more. I'm thinking, "He's allegedly smart and he's supposed to be handsome, but he's lame in bed, and HE WORKS AT A CAR WASH? The hell?" because certainly, as the attractive daughter of a rich man, Reesa can do better. Or so I imagine. Rev. Martian yells at everyone to shut up and then Ally apologizes. She says that it happened at a car wash and that she'd never seen Joel before. Rev. Martian's like, "Slut much?" Joel doesn't deny what she says. He takes Reesa out of the room to speak to her alone.
In Nelle's office, John is saying that the trouble started with some study about women being attracted to different kinds of men when they're ovulating. He says that three weeks out of the month, they want to date good providers, but during ovulation they want virile he-men. Or something. Nelle's like, "The hell?" John says that everyone knows what category he falls into and that when you add to that the recent débacle over the phone sex, the case of the promiscuous bride, and Ally at the car wash...Nelle cuts him off and asks what's going on. He starts saying that he knows women have sexual fantasies but it's the idea that they might act on them that troubles him. Nelle's like, "Oh, but it's okay for men?" and John's like "That's different" and blah, blah, men are from Mars and have to live in their caves, and then we hear Elaine laughing her butt off outside the door. John runs her off and then eventually makes his point. He doesn't want Nelle fantasizing about other men. "You want to regulate my thoughts?" Nelle asks. "No. I want YOU to regulate them," clarifies John. Nelle is flabbergasted. She tells John to just go away. Word! The clarinet plays as John slams her door.
Ally, Richard, and Ling are in another one of the church's many rooms. Richard wants to know why Ally couldn't just keep her big mouth shut. He says, "If you wanna go around fornicating in car washes, fine, but this is the daughter of our biggest client. Why ruin her wedding?" He addresses the subject of double standards. Ally has no comprehensible answer. He turns to his "kumquat" and asks her to help him out. Ling reads my mind again and says, "She perhaps felt upstaged by the bride and this was a way to make it about her." Ally takes offense and carps about how hard it was to speak up and make everyone in the church think of her as a tramp (in addition to a grouchy, unkempt bridesmaid.) She claims that she can tell that Joel is marrying Reesa for her money. Richard asks if she's sticking up for Reesa or punishing Joe. A guitar plays and Ally admits that she doesn't know. I really like Richard's tie.