Episode Report Card Wing Chun: D+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT April Showers
By Wing Chun | Season 7 | Episode 18 | Aired on 04.18.2001
Mark makes his way through the traffic on foot, arriving at the scene of a two-car accident. From the sound of the bickering, it seems a female motorist repeatedly rammed the car of her husband, or ex-husband, or soon-to-be-ex-husband. As Mark joins them, the guy says that she was out of control, and Mrs. Car Crash bitterly asks, "How much control do you have over your zipper, Kevin?" There's a cop standing by, but he looks like he's given up trying to mediate the situation. Mark approaches another cop and asks how long it will be before they clear the street. The cop wearily tells him to step aside. Mark says he's supposed to be getting married; the cop doesn't care. Mark says that he's a doctor at County and asks whether one of the cops could give him a lift. Nice try pulling rank, Mr. Cellophane. The cop, getting into his car, snorts, "You're joking, right?"
County. Chen enters Iceboy's room, saying she heard he was awake. Lily gives her his vitals. Chen introduces herself and tells Iceboy he's in a hospital. She explains, in dumbed-down language, what was wrong with him and what they did to treat him. Finally, she asks his name; it's Brian Cooley. Hee! I'll say he was cool...ey! Wait, that's not supposed to be funny. Never mind. Sorry. Kid almost froze to death. Happened to be named "Cooley." Not funny. (hee.) Chen asks whether he remembers what happened. Brian (formerly Iceboy) says that he was waiting, and that he thinks he fell asleep on the field. She asks what he was waiting for, and Brian mewls, "They were supposed to pick me up." Chen asks whether, by "they," he means his teammates, but Brian says he meant his parents: "They forgot." Chen purses her lips, and thinks what a better job she'd do as a parent if she hadn't given up the precious baby she had to those horrible people from Portland. But she plays it off and tries to cover for Brian's parents, saying that it's a pretty bad storm, and that they might have been detained by the weather. Brian, pitifully: "No. They work a lot. Sometimes they forget." Chen looks real sad.
Car accident. A rig pulls up and Mark mooches over to Doris, who climbs out of it. She asks what he's doing there, and he begs her to give him a ride to Northbrook. Your tax dollars at work, folks. Chauffeuring doctors with poor time-management skills to their weddings. Doris says it's outside her catchment area. He tells her about the wedding, and she relents, asking him to help her clear the scene. Doris approaches Kevin, and Mark asks him to let her check his vital signs. "Let him bleed!" interjects Mrs. Kevin. I get my first good look at Kevin and see he's played by Arye Gross, who used to be a second-tier movie star. Okay, third-tier. Still. Two dark scenes on ER is a step down from where he used to be. (Which is in The Experts with John Travolta and Kelly Preston.) Mark sunnily tells Kevin that if he's okay, he can take himself to the hospital. Kevin's like, "Who the hell are you?" Mark tells him he's a doctor. Doris asks Kevin whether he hit his head. Kevin, who's holding a tissue to his bleeding forehead, snaps, "What do you think?" Benton shows up and asks Mark what's going on; Mark tells him that he's going to catch a ride with Doris to the church. (I'm sure at this point Doris is thinking, "Thanks for the invitation, former Emergency Whatever Liaison Maggot.") Benton tells Mark to wait in the car and says he'll clear the scene; Mark directs Benton to examine Mrs. Kevin. Benton asks Mrs. Kevin, who is pregnant, whether she's in any pain. Mrs. Kevin ignores him, choosing instead to harangue Kevin, "Where is the little whore? Getting more ass fat put in her lips?" Kevin shoots back, "She didn't slam her car into anybody, you psychotic bitch!" (At this point, Mark's thinking, "I'm glad I'm not marrying anyone this pregnant and mean. Oh, wait...shit.") Mrs. Kevin is partway through another insult when she kind of lurches and bends over. Benton asks what's happening, and she says she thinks her water just broke. My god, you people, Mark has to get to his wedding! How can you all be so selfish?! Benton asks when the baby's due, and Kevin replies, "Tuesday." Benton asks whether it's her first baby, and Mrs. Kevin sniffs, "No, I gave this bastard a son." Mark asks how long her first labour was.