Episode Report Card Sara M: A+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Cornucopia of Crazy
By Sara M | Season 9 | Episode 9 | Aired on 11.14.2004
Matt storms away, which means that, according to the 7th Heaven Property of Spatial Relations, a vacuum has been created that must be filled by another, even more annoying, character. Enter Ruthie, who asks RevCam what's up. After he tells her that her mother is straddling the line between "quirkily eccentric" and "batshit crazy," Ruthie announces that she's been invited to spend Thanksgiving with Mary and Carlos in sunny Puerto Rico, where she can get in touch with her roots and hopefully learn why that green sweater vest she's wearing isn't a good fashion choice. Ruthie says she already has a ticket, thanks to Mary's free passes, and there's a room in Carlos's parents' house just for her. Ruthie really wants to go, even though she suspects that Mary and Carlos only invited her because they need a baby-sitter, which is maybe the worst idea Mary's ever had, since we all know that Ruthie eats babies for their precious life-giving blood. RevCam says no. Ruthie says that if he's only saying no because he doesn't want her to fly to Puerto Rico alone, Carlos will be flying to Glenoak to pick her up and then flying to Puerto Rico with her. So that's how many roundtrip jetBlue passes Mary has given away, now? Matt, PC, Mary, Carlos (twice), and Ruthie, all during the biggest travel holiday of the year? I was a damn fool to go to college when I could have worked as a flight attendant and been privy to one of the greatest benefits packages ever offered! RevCam again says that Ruthie can't go, to which she says that she already promised that she would go. Well, maybe next time, Ruthie, you'll actually ask your parents for permission before you make any commitments. Like Lucy, who probably asks her parents if it's okay every time she has sex with Kevin. RevCam says the whole thing isn't even an issue because Carlos, Mary, and the baby will be spending Thanksgiving in Glenoak.
Ruthie leaves, and Mac and Martin enter from Martin's room, where they have apparently been for quite some time. They claim to be on their way to the "batting cages," as if they haven't just spent enough time hitting balls with lengths of wood. Feeling desperate, RevCam invites Mac to Thanksgiving at the CamPound, since he knows how upset mothers are when their children don't make it to Thanksgiving holidays, and he apparently wants Mac's mom to suffer like Annie currently is. What a compassionate man of God RevCam is! Mac says he can't go because his dad is visiting his sister, although Mac won't be going with him, as his aunt hates him because he did something bad involving a cat, her Hummel collection, and fire. And Mac's mother will be spending the day with her boyfriend, who Mac doesn't like, so he's going to go camping this year. RevCam tells him to come the CamPound instead, but Mac says he'd rather sleep on rocks, wipe his ass with leaves, and subsist on Pop-Tarts than hang with the Camdens, which I completely understand. It turns out that Martin feels the same way, as he'll be accompanying Mac. RevCam feigns ignorance of Martin's plans, even though Martin insists that he told him about this weeks ago. RevCam begs Martin to cancel his plans with Mac and spend Thanksgiving with the Camdens, but Martin says that celebrating a family holiday with his mother dead and his father in Iraq sucks, and a camping trip with his friend will be a lot more fun for him.
RevCam stops by the twins' room and invites them out for lunch, and a perceptive Vid asks him what's wrong. RevCam says nothing will be wrong once he gets his children together for Thanksgiving. Oh, but it turns out that SamVid have Thanksgiving plans as well -- they've been invited to dinner at Lucy's! RevCam makes a hasty retreat.