Episode Report Card Sara M: A- | 135 USERS: B- YOU GRADE IT A Poolhouse Is Rory's New Home
By Sara M | Season 5 | Episode 22 | Aired on 2005.05.17
Luke sees Taylor standing on the corner of the street and runs across it to talk to him, taking out several bikers on the way. That's what they get for taking three days to start a race. Luke tells Taylor that he's using his cooling-off period option to cancel the transaction. He doesn't want the house anymore.
Emily and Richard enjoy breakfast together. Emily talks to Richard, who doesn't seem to be paying any attention to her. So she says that she's planning to run off with Marshall, the golf instructor. Richard says that's fine. The doorbell rings, and Emily wonders who it could be. Richard says it's probably Marshall, who can't wait to "have" Emily: "I know I couldn't." Ew. Ew. Ew. Enter Lorelai, who sits down and asks her parents for their help because Rory is quitting Yale. Emily immediately accuses Lorelai of lying, and says she doesn't appreciate the joke. Lorelai says she isn't lying. She tells them about the disastrous dinner at the Rich mansion, which I thought she told them about before, to their disbelief, but this time they do believe her and are not pleased to hear that Rory was considered "not good enough" for Richie. Lorelai adds that Mitch then offered Rory the internship to rip her dreams apart with the performance evaluation, after which Rory lost her shit and stole a boat and got arrested. Richard whips out a little notebook -- a move that I love -- and asks Lorelai what she needs them to do. Lorelai says she told Rory that coming home to waste time in Stars Hollow isn't an option, and that she's hoping that, at dinner this week, they can "triple-team" Rory and convince her to stay in school. They should just hire Mr. T for that. He's probably affordable, and kids being cool and staying in school was always really important to him. Richard says he'll work on getting Rory a lawyer. Emily's anxious to talk to Rory now, but Lorelai and Richard both think it's better to wait. Emily offers Lorelai some breakfast. "I think I just got everything I need," Lorelai says. Sigh.
Some time later, Richard asks the newest Maid Victim if one of his shoes seems more faded than the other. Maid responds by shaking and looking terrified. She's like the human version of a bunny rabbit. Richard can't deal with all this womanly emotion, and tells her to go work or something. Off she scampers. Sadly for him, Richard's encounters with fragile female feelings are not over, as Rory comes to the house, arms folded under her chest and shoulders hunched in sadness, and says she needs to talk to him. He tries to avoid all of this and asks if it can wait until dinner, when there will be two other women/buffer zones around. ["I thought his hesitancy was also because he thought he'd be helpless to resist Rory's persuasive powers on his own." -- Wing Chun] Then Rory breaks out into non-tears. The look of horror on Richard's face at this blatant display of emotion is hilarious. Rory says that she messed everything up and that her life is falling apart. Richard says that Emily will be back soon and couldn't Rory hold her tears until then? Yeah, like Emily will be able to handle this any better. Rory cries tearlessly. Richard offers to make tea. Rory initiates human contact with him, and he has no choice but to hug her back and say that everything will be all right.