Episode Report Card Al Lowe: A | 2 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT Con Men And Trotskyites!
By Al Lowe | Season 6 | Episode 14 | Aired on 02.06.2006
Still in the hallway with her stuff, Rory calls Logan. "There are no singles left," she says. Logan is, as you might imagine, confused. Rory says that there are no apartments anywhere on campus. I...hate it when this show does this. Don't call someone up and start talking in the middle of a story. This is not a French farce where all sorts of hijinks are about to break out based on some simple misunderstanding. This ain't Three's Company! ["True, and more's the pity." -- Wing Chun] Logan, naturally, is confused, but Rory finally explains the editorship, the kicking out, etc. "Hotplate Harriet took it very badly," she says. Logan says that Paris is an idiot (and he ought to know), and asks what Rory's doing now. She says she's waiting on Starving Students to come move her stuff, but she's skeptical: "How starving can they be if the can't come 'til five hours after you call? Plus, I heard that guy crunching on something during our call; sounded like Baked Lays." Cute. Speaking of crunching, Logan bites the big one. He says that since Rory's got nowhere to go, she should move in with him. He says she's already there half the time anyway, and already has two dresser drawers she calls her own, so why not? "And right now, for a limited time," he says, "I'll throw in three more drawers, and a set of Ginsu knives." Rory is intrigued. "Really?" she says, and he shakes his head, admitting, "I have no idea where to get Ginsu knives." I wish you did, dude. If they can cut through a piece of rebar, they might be able to take a slice out of your smarm. Rory says it's really sweet of him to offer, but that it's kind of a big step; still, Logan presses on. "You need a place, I've got the space," he says. "It'll be fun." Rory gives in: "Well, I might need just one more drawer. I can put my socks in a shoebox under the bed." Logan seems glad she's saying yes, and says he's calling Colin and Finn to come pick up her stuff. I don't understand why HE cannot come and help her move her stuff. Why are Colin and Finn his personal moving service? What exactly is he doing right now, anyway? Looking up ever funkier male hairdos online? Buying stock in gray sweaters? Writing a paper on how to get someone else to write all your papers for you?
In the kitchen at the Inn, Lorelai finds Michel sorting his ration of twelve daily walnuts. "I hate to see you bingeing like this," Lorelai tells him, before launching into the reason for her visit: "Let's talk about your little spat with Luke, today." Michel rolls his eyes, calling Luke a crybaby. Lorelai insists that Luke is not a crybaby, but that he doesn't like getting screamed at by people he's doing favors for. "Did you check his diaper?" Michel asks. "Maybe he's just upset because you forgot to change him today." SNAP! Good one, Michel. He adds that he used to yell at Parker all the time, and that Parker never complained. "What is this thing with you and Parker?" Lorelai asks. "Did he save your life in 'Nam?" Michel snipes that Parker, unlike Luke, is a professional. "Parker," Lorelai says, "is a clumsy, forgetful, sixty-five-year-old, semi-lucid, not that handy handyman." Flustered, Michel says that Luke wears a hat indoors. "So did Parker," Lorelai retorts. Michel says Parker's hat was a wool knit cap, which is completely different. "So," Lorelai says, trying to understand, "this is a hat thing?" Michel says that he just does not like Luke's system -- that he misses many things that need not be missed. Lorelai repeats that, in that case, Michel needs to jot down a list for Luke. "That's not how we make the list," Michel says. Lorelai says that they'll type it up, then. "NO!" Michel says, finally breaking down. "We make the list at Westin's over coffee. That's what we do when we make the list. We go once a month to Westin's together, and we sit and we decide on the work for the handyman." Lorelai looks stunned while Michel rants on. "That's our thing," Michel says, his voice cracking. "We get very large coffees, and we split a slice of red velvet cake, and we gossip and I eat the whole cake and you never tell anyone." Lorelai is moved. She says that she has always enjoyed their trips to Westin's. "Oh, yes," Michel says. "That is what I do when I like something -- I cut it out of my life completely." Lorelai insists that she didn't cut coffee with Michel out of her life, but that it's just been crazy around the place and she felt like having Luke do the odd jobs would save them money. She asks what Michel is doing that afternoon. "I was going to yell at Doreen," he says, morose, "about the soap spots on the bathroom floor tiles." Lorelai says they should go to Westin's, but Michel says he doesn't want her "pity cake." She insists it isn't pity cake, and as a matter of fact, it's so delicious, he has to get his own this time because they are not sharing. Placated, Michel agrees. My God, what an endless scene. Cute, yes, but endless -- I am never going to complain about Michel being in an episode, but it's painful to see him used purely as filler in an hour full of filler.