Episode Report Card Demian: B+ | 0 USERS: N/A YOU GRADE IT Siren Song
By Demian | Season 5 | Episode 4 | Aired on 2002.10.06
"Wow," Bettie goofs, wiping a bit of simmering spittle from the side of her mouth. "Your husband was so much fun!" Bettie grabs Mousy Missy by the brassiere and slings her across the room into a vanity. Bettie ambles over to the window and flutters her hand across the drapes as Mousy Missy wheezes on the carpet. The drapes burst into flames. Missy dives for her slutty dead Dave, but Bettie pulls her back by her hair to lay a little exposition on her mousy ass before leaving her to die. "I was burned for my sins," Bettie explains. "Only fair you should burn, too." Mousy Missy drops to the floor unconscious as Bettie smokes on out of there.
The Bay Mirror. Phoebe's on the phone with Cole, whining about their relationship. Again. "Death did us part, Cole," she gripes. "Just because you figured out a way to come back doesn't mean I didn't keep my end of the bargain." They reference the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. They bicker about his pro bono work. They dispute his repeated protestations of innocence. Thankfully, a breaking news story on Cole's office television cuts this hateful conversation short. Cole wiggles some mojo from his fingers to the set, upping the volume to learn that Mousy Missy and Slutty Dave's neighbors fear they're still trapped in their blazing apartment. Cole drops the telephone receiver onto his desk and smears out. Phoebe shouts his name a couple of times as her colleagues at the paper gather around a television of their own. The colleagues mumble their collective astonishment when Cole suddenly appears on the screen, lugging the limp and suspiciously unsinged form of Mousy Missy out of the blazing building and into the arms of a waiting fireman. Phoebe's struck dumb and gapes as the credits smack her in the teeth.