Episode Report Card Demian: B- | 1 USERS: B- YOU GRADE IT Shape of...a smackdown!
By Demian | Season 1 | Episode 3 | Aired on 10.20.1998
The scene continues with Phoebe getting a bit teary-eyed at the whole reunion thing, but I keep seeing her riding his mulleted ass in some tawdry Long Island motel and then blowing a hole in his wife's head, so it's just not working for me. The two eventually embrace, and Phoebe is flung into a premonition. The Teflon Dad snatches the Book of Shadows, grins maliciously, and backs away. Phoebe snaps out of it as the suite's phone rings. She concocts a hasty excuse to get away from him and bolts out of the room as he calls after her, "Phoebe! Wait!"
Manor. A whistling mailman lopes up the front steps and approaches the door. As The Thrumming Cello Of Demonic Intent hits the soundtrack, the mailman's eyes darken, and the camera pans down his body to his right hand. He extends his index finger, and ew! His fingertip morphs out into a key, and it's still attached to his hand! We get a completely unnecessary and vile shot of the flesh-into-metal fingertip key unlocking the front door, accompanied by appropriate sound effects, and then we cut to the darkened interior of the front hallway. God! That was disgusting! Couldn't he have morphed his entire hand into a key, rather than a single appendage? That was just too...repulsively evocative. Ew! The mailman shoots a wicked side-eye at his reflection in the mirror before bounding upstairs to the attic. He rattles the doorknob for a moment, then boots in the door with demonically enhanced force. He strides across the floor, spots the Book of Shadows lying innocently on its pedestal, and snatches it up into his arms, turning to race back down the stairs. So much for the fucking Book protecting itself from evil. The mailman attempts to exit the Manor with the thing, but as he crosses the threshold, the Book flares and zips backwards out of the crook of his arm onto the floor. The mailman grabs it from the floor, and then the actor engages in an amusing pantomimed tug-of-war with the prop before he hurls it towards the porch. The Book reaches the front door, flares again, and falls to the carpet. More violent struggling between the morphing man and the flaring prop, and this really should not amuse me as much as it does.
At that moment, Prue rounds the corner below to begin her climb up the steps. The mailman scampers back indoors, hurls the Book into the parlor, and morphs into Andy. Prue enters and starts at the sight of her supposed boyfriend. The Mandy feigns surprise, claiming he dropped by to check on the gals and found the door unlocked. Prue narrows her eyes at this and sets her purse on the entrance table. She spots the Book reflected in the hallway mirror and turns to surreptitiously TK it across the parlor floor under a low bookcase. Too-casually, she remarks that she's changed her mind about those Warriors tickets now that The Teflon Dad is in town. As she wants to avoid her father at all costs, she agrees to go to the game. The Mandy does a very bad job of pretending to know what she's talking about, all stuttering and stammering and blurting, "Great!" Neighbor Cynda suspiciously raps on the door, poking her head inside for a quick hello, making like they've agreed to keep an eye on each other's homes in light of last night's canine invasion of the Manor. Prue thanks her and waves her off. Cynda glares at The Mandy and exits. The Mandy fidgets and notes that he should probably leave as well. He awkwardly pecks Prue on the cheek and leaves. Prue locks the door behind him, pauses to collect herself, then clomps through the parlor to retrieve the Book from the floor. She examines it thoughtfully as she heads for the stairs. Upon reaching the blown-in attic door, she draws herself up short in consternation and mutters, "What the hell?" as she gazes upon the wreckage in the room. The camera slowly pulls in to her face. Shannen Doherty, mistress of the expressionless expression, blankly escorts us into the commercial break.