Episode Report Card Sara M: C- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Tell Me Lies, Tell Me Sweet Little Lies
By Sara M | Season 8 | Episode 22 | Aired on 05.09.2004
Chandler tracks down Kendull, who sternly tells him that "there are some tough anti-stalking laws in California." Um, no, there aren't. Chandler apologizes to Kendull, who calls him a "pompous jerk." Chandler would rather be called a "pompous ass," but Kendull doesn't use that kind of language. Good call, Kendull: surely it was my proclivity for cussing that kept me from realizing my dream of being a National Merit Scholar. That, and the fact that I fell asleep during the PSATs. Oops! But let's not take any more time away from Kendull: she's calling Chandler "arrogant, patronizing, condescending and presumptuous. In other words, [Chandler was] pompous." Wow, guys, Kendull really is smart, look at the big word she's using! Not to mention her keen powers of perception. Chandler doubts that Kendull could be intelligent if she thinks such bad things about him. Kendull tells him that she is intelligent, and he shouldn't let the mini-skirt fool him -- oh wait, it already did. Psst…hey, Kendull? Chandler's gaffe may have stemmed more from the fact that you just don't come off as intelligent at all than it did from your choice of attire. And also, learn to accept that people do judge you by the way you dress, so when you're meeting someone in a professional setting, you really should dress professionally. Chandler decides to find someone to tutor his faux-kid who doesn't insult him with words he doesn't understand, and turns to leave. "Twenty bucks an hour!" shouts Kendull. Ha! She's a WHORE after all! Oh, that's her tutoring rate. Chandler accepts and says he'll bring Jeffrey by at six.
Lucy comes home to the Treehouse of Lurv to find Kevin. He says he heard from "Joe at the station" that she stopped by. Lucy at the Treehouse says Kevin at the Treehouse is right: back when she was Lucy at the station, she found out that Roxanne at parts unknown is going for a promotion behind Kevin's back! Kevin doesn't really care. Lucy thinks he should; Roxanne is doing this "after everything [Kevin's] done for her; [Lucy's] done for her!" Like…not pay enough attention, thus allowing her to be stabbed by a homeless guy! And constantly accusing her of being a homewrecker! And let's not forget ruining her hair! I can't understand why Roxanne would do such a traitorous thing when her friends have been so supportive of her like that. Kevin still doesn't care, so Lucy accuses him of being unambitious. Kevin says he likes being a beat cop right now, and he doesn't need the extra money. And he isn't going to make any assumptions about Roxanne until she tells him what's going on.