Episode Report Card Demian: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Not Without My Done One
By Demian | Season 6 | Episode 3 | Aired on 10.04.2003
Let the Object of Objection
Become but a Dream
As I cause the Seen
To become Unseen.
The Golden Gate Bridge just melts away from the top down in a series of thin gold streaks that flare out briefly when they hit the deck of the roadway, before the entire thing vanishes completely. Too fun. "You might want to take an alternate route to work in the morning," Piper grins.
Attic. The ladies orb in, congratulating each other on a job well done. Harvey and Jean follow, wondering why they still remember the day's events. The gals aren't about to reveal that particular secret, and threaten to replicate their hijinks on the evening news as often as necessary until Tiny Gay Chris is once more safely ensconced in the Manor. Harvey and Jean threaten to "erase" the Charmed Ones if they insist upon such a course of action. Piper calls their bluff. "You can't," she smiles, shaking her head, tossing around her fabulous hair in the process. "Not if you're truly neutral, that is. You see, if you get rid of us, you tip the balance from good to evil. That's hardly being neutral, now is it?" Harve and Jean blink. "You will give me my son back," Piper calmly announces, "or I swear -- the only thing you'll be doing for the next fifty years is cleaning up after us." Harvey allows a considered pause before asking, "If we do return him, how do we know you'll be able to control him?" "I'm his mother," Piper asserts. "If anyone can, I can." Girl, please. Just wait 'til Tiny Chris hits his first kegger in junior high and starts vanquishing all those jock assholes who've been calling him a faggot since the first day of kindergarten. Harvey's not nearly as skeptical as I, though, for he wiggles his fingers, and Tiny Gay Chris presently reappears in his product-placed playpen. The Cleaners prepare to take their leave. Unfortunately for all of us, Phoebe leaps in front of them and proceeds to browbeat them into erasing all evidence of that morning's riot at The Mirror. To shut her the fuck up, Harvey waves a hand in the air and wearily announces, "It's done." "Good luck," he offers to Piper by way of goodbye, "because believe me, you're going to need it." Harve and Jean mottle out of there.
Phoebe pierces my eardrums with squealing baby-talk until the scene gradually and mercifully cross-fades to a shot of the restored Golden Gate Bridge, laden with early morning rush-hour traffic. Over at Ritzteukolskyandruben Please Hold, Flo tensely taps her toe on the carpet. Her "interview" with Lecherous Ed doesn't seem to be going to well. "Unless you make it worth my while," Lecherous Ed leers, "I may find your performance here…lacking." If you know what he means, and I think you do. Fluttery Flo suddenly undergoes a complete personality transplant. No, seriously. Her body language loosens up entirely, and she shoots Lecherous Ed a smoldering come-hither stare. "I like a man who knows what he wants and isn't afraid to ask for it," she claims. "Now," she continues, flirtatiously twirling her hair, "are you afraid to come get it?" "Right here?" he stammers. Flo's all, "You betcha, big boy." Lecherous Ed leans over to his intercom and instructs his secretary to hold his calls, then jumps up to grope Flo. Flo rises to her feet, and, just as Ed rounds the corner of his desk, shouts, "Flowerpot!" A heavy vase orbs off its nearby table to crash into Ed's head. As he drops to the floor, groaning, Flo morphs into a smugly triumphant Raige. Famous Original Flo raps at the office door and enters to find the evil boss-man crumpled in a heap on the carpet. Raige lies that she "overheard" Lecherous Ed's inappropriate threats, and adds with a wink, "He'll be lucky if you don't sue." Flo, elated, thanks Raige repeatedly. Raige smiles fondly and shrugs it off. "I was wondering why I took this job," she confesses, "and now I know. Thank you." They hug, and Raige takes off.