Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | 2 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT Picture This
By Jacob Clifton | Season 2 | Episode 9 | Aired on 08.09.2011
LUNCH
Ashley, sitting in the pitch dark for some reason: "Hanna, call your stepmother. You're a bridesmaid for that doomed wedding."
Hanna: "Like I even need to tell you how many different ways that's weird."
Ashley: "At least call your father and explain to him why you're ruining his wedding. That way my hands stay clean."
Liars: "I can't believe Jenna's getting prosthetic corneas that will allow her the gift of sight. What a bitch."
Hanna: "They're taking out her EYEBALLS?"
Spencer: "No, just the flap over the whatever. I did one this morning."
Emily: "Fuckin' my stomach fought its way out of my abdomen and ran around the room shrieking the other day. Can we please stop talking about eyeball flaps until I can at least keep water down?"
Aria: "Will it work?"
Spencer: "Toby said maybe. I hope it kills her."
Hanna: "Hey. Does this mean we're off the hook for blinding her that time?"
Spencer: "Even my ethics are not that situational, lady. Give me a break."
Emily: "At least she won't come after us about all the videotapes of her raping her brother and whatever."
Spencer: "Have you met us? She's inches away anyway. No matter what, her eyesight will make things ten times worse."
Emily: "How so?"
Spencer, with amazing pedagogy: "Well, for one, she'll be able to aim a gun."
Hanna, verbatim: "Yeah. Jenna's scary enough with four senses."
(And that's the end of the scene. They all stare at each other and think about what horrors Jenna might do, with extra senses.)
After school Spencer goes to spy on Jason, like you do. He yells at yard guys for trying to get into his detached garage or shed or whatever before hiding the key on the doorframe where she can easily reach it. I love how everybody's house is so scary that they all have extra houses and barns nearby, to contain the extra scariness.
EVERYTHING GETS BETTER
Samara brings Emily chocolate chip cookies, and then meets Hanna's mom, but then immediately has to leave. There is a problem having to do with the location of their circle of sisterhood meetup, so Ashley offers the perfection that is her house for their coven's use.
Emily: "[Amazing, characteristic gratitude, etc.]"
Ashley: "Just don't let anybody touch the lasagna box, I keep my cancer cures and war bonds in there."
Emily: "But seriously."
Ashley: "Number one, this is your home. Get on board. And number two, you get to be whoever you want to be, and that includes having lesbian meetings and being gay. The rule for Hanna is, no boys upstairs. So for you, no girls upstairs. Unless you are just hanging out and not being gay. Wait, tell me how to spot the difference."
Emily: "The difference is, I am not a ho. So it's moot."