Episode Report Card Pamie: C+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT She Bop, He Bop a-We Bop
By Pamie | Season 5 | Episode 5 | Aired on 10.18.2004
Back to other inappropriate women: Lorelai has the horrible idea of a double date. Luke doesn't know at first that there will be a man taller than he in attendance, so he agrees to go out with the two Lorelais. When he finds out there's a fourth, he's all, "Dean?" But it's too late, and Rory's off for a booty call, empty-handed. No purse?
Now Luke's mad because Lorelai tricked him into going on a date with Dean, and Luke didn't know he was dating Rory again. He asks Lorelai if she was hiding it. Lorelai says she didn't know how to tell people, or whether Dean and Rory wanted everyone to know. I guess if they didn't want everyone to know, there shouldn't have been two very public fights about the whole thing. Everybody knows, Lorelai. And if everybody doesn't know, what the hell is that about? This town is built on gossip and drama. Everybody would be talking about this. Luke would totally know from Sookie or Miss Patty or Babette that Dean left Lindsay for Rory. Lorelai offers to let Luke out of the double date, but he says that he just has to get his head around the whole thing and he'll be fine. Then Luke says he'll be right back, and we watch him walk out of the room because I guess this episode was a little short and they needed some moments where we watch people walk out of rooms. Has every scene in this episode ended that way?
Band practice. Brian is teaching mfTL the chord progression for a song he wrote, which has the working title of "Brian's Song." MfTL says it's depressing, because he keeps thinking of the movie. He suggests changing it to "Lepers Are Fun" or "Kiss My Scurvy." Sitting next to me, Stee is watching a Mr. Show DVD, where Titanica has just written "Adam's Song (Try Again)." Hee! Lane renames the song "Brian's Tune." MfTL asks for five so he can go clear his head (read: smoke a joint). Brian decides to go water the lawn because they're getting brown spots again. MfTL pouts on a couch, pretending to read. Lane asks him what's new. He says he went to the dentist, who told him he was brushing too vigorously. They decide that getting told as a kid to brush like hell was just another lie fed to their generation. mfTL says he's paying for it now with eroding gums: "Wanna see 'em?" Lane says she's good. She asks if there's anything on his mind. "Not really," mfTL says, before running off to get a drink. He asks if she wants anything. "Nope," Lane says. "I want for nothing."
You guys. They blew Kyle's arm off in the war. He's got a wall covered in Dylan posters, and tells Rory he listened to a lot of Dylan while he was at sea: "He really spoke to me." Rory: "And you understood him?" Kyle laughs and tells Rory she's funny. Kyle says that the Navy has been fantastic. He holds up his arm and says, "Bitchin' rehab, so I'm up and running. I can drive. Type sixty words a minute." I think, somehow, that last thing wasn't supposed to be a joke. Kyle tells Rory that the hook is "a chick magnet." Kyle: "Yeah, it's the Captain Hook thing." I think he meant Captain Jack Sparrow, but it's still not true. We don't have pirate fetishes, and if any of you do, I forbid you from emailing me about it. They just announced the in-flight movie: The Clearing, starring Robert Redford, which means I'll be finishing this recap. Dean enters, surprised to see Rory, and gives her a peck on the lips. Kyle goes, "Oh! I think I know what that means!" He starts to head to his bedroom, saying he'll make himself scarce. Rory immediately tries to keep Kyle in the room so that she doesn't have to do anything physical with her boyfriend. I really hate the rest of this scene, and hate that I have to recap it. Here goes: Kyle runs down a list of all the women he's going to call to find out which ones he's having sex with tonight. "He's been throwing it around a lot lately," Dean says. Gross! Kyle lifts the hook again and brags that everybody loves the bionic man. A cell phone starts ringing. Kyle says that's not him, because his phone plays "Superfreak." Dude, I hope this is based on someone real, because otherwise it's fucking weird to write this character in for like, two minutes of this series. It's just creepy and I don't get it. As Rory answers her phone, Kyle tells Dean he's leaving them so they can "play."