Episode Report Card Couch Baron: A | 7 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT So Bye, Bye, Miss Lillian Kane...
By Couch Baron | Season 1 | Episode 22 | Aired on 05.09.2005
Cut to a headline in the "San Diego Dispatch" detailing Cheyenne's claim. Considering how far we have to pan up to see the reader, this is a minor example of "burying the lead." Of course, considering one reader is Dick Casablancas, the camera guy couldn't be blamed for starting as far away as possible. Beaver is reading over Dick's shoulder, and he's agitated about the phone records and the shoes. Dick tells him that they don't mean anything, and that he needs to chill: "To the grave, man, that's what we said." In keeping with certain horror conventions that appear later in the episode, I'll say this: I know what you did last spring, you two. Now if you'll give me a minute to scrub my brain, we'll all be good.
Wallace is reading highlights of the story to Veronica as they walk down the hall. Veronica says you'd think it would be gross to read a love letter to your dad, but she kind of enjoys it. Moving right along. Veronica sees Logan down the hall, and practically breaks the sound barrier shoving Wallace into the girls' bathroom. Wallace: "My blonde-pulling-me-into-the-girls'-room fantasy? Ruined!" Veronica asks, "Do me a favor?," but Wallace simultaneously parrots her, and even adds in her signature head-tilt. Hee. Veronica asks him to go out and tell her when Logan's gone, and Wallace good-naturedly agrees, but asks how much longer Veronica thinks she can avoid him. This would appear to settle the question of whether she told Wallace about Logan during her big confession last episode. Well, it's good that she thinks dating Logan isn't more shameful than incest. But "No worse than incest!" still isn't exactly a testimonial. No wonder you don't see it on a lot of billboards.
Mars Investigations. Alicia dolefully looks out the window. Keith says he doesn't want to hurt her, but that if there's a chance to keep his family together, he's got to take it. This...strikes me as a little false, mainly because we've never seen any on-screen evidence of Keith and Lianne being happy. Also, remember Keith's emotional outburst that he didn't care to find Lianne? I mean, I'm sure she made a good pitch about the rehab and everything, but there's still the cheating to contend with, and Keith and Alicia really seemed to be serious. I know Keith's doing it mainly for Veronica but still -- eh. Alicia, on the same wavelength, asks if this is really what Keith wants but, getting no answer, starts to break down and leaves, passing Veronica, on the way, with a significant look. Veronica asks Keith if everything's okay, and Keith responds that he had to tell Alicia that his situation has changed. Veronica gives a heartfelt "Sorry," but opines that Alicia has to understand, what with Lianne coming back and all. Yes, I'm sure the working widow raising two kids on her own is tripping all over herself to vacate her romantic spot for the cheating, abandoning, useless trash. She's probably just crying from stubbing her toe, so extreme was her haste to get out of the way. Veronica and Keith hug. Well, that's nice, at least.