Episode Report Card Pamie: B | 0 USERS: N/A YOU GRADE IT Rory's A Material Girl
By Pamie | Season 5 | Episode 8 | Aired on November 8, 2004
Rory has been all dolled up in hair and makeup. But Emily thinks she needs a little frosting. That stupid movie. Now when I see diamond necklaces, I always picture McConaughey talking about frosting. I hate it! Emily wraps an expensive-looking diamond necklace around Rory's neck and then adds diamond earrings and a tiara. "You look like a princess," Emily says. ["It's way too much. Either the necklace or the tiara; with both, she looks like she's playing dress-up." -- Wing Chun] Rory asks if she's sure Emily wants her wearing all of this expensive stuff: "If something should happen --" "Nothing's going to happen," Emily smiles. She says that Rory looks exactly like how Emily wants her to look in front of her guests. How can Rory not tell she's about to enter a one-woman beauty pageant? She's wearing a tiara, for God's sake. Who wears a tiara to a party when it's not your birthday, wedding, or Halloween?
At the top of the stairs, Emily shouts, "Everyone! Here's Rory!" It's a little less formal than Rory's last debutante ball, but it's the same concept. A crowd below "ooh"s and "ah"s. I can't believe Emily called her "Rory." Richard tells Rory she looks royal. Rory says it's probably the crown. She's getting all folksy for some reason, saying, "stuff," and hunching forward so much that it's like she's got osteoporosis. Alexis Bledel. Stand up straight! I thought you were a model! Richard immediately introduces Rory to some of his friends, but mostly he's introducing her to their son. Emily grabs Rory by the stomach and pulls her away to make the rounds. They meet another rich family. I hate the sound of simulated rich small talk, don't you? Fake laugh, fake laugh, pension plan, fake laugh. Oh, everybody's so simply marvelous. Rory keeps adjusting her straps, looking like she's never been in a dress before in her life. More meeting rich bachelors, small talk, fake guffaws. I refuse to recap anything with characters named Bunny and Napoleon Barnes. Rory just now realizes the party is full of boys and no girls. She excuses herself for a moment and pushes her grandparents into another room.