Episode Report Card Dan Kwa: A | 143 USERS: B- YOU GRADE IT The Second Time Is Always the Sweetest Time (For Rammin')
By Dan Kwa | Season 1 | Episode 2 | Aired on 2004.09.29
Boone, God's Friggin' Gift to Humanity, approaches his sister, who's staring at a corpse and sniffling away. Aw, now she's gonna go all soft on us? That ruins the point of a pricelessly bitchy character! I only want to watch Shannon stare at a corpse and cry if it's Dynasty-style fake crying, employed to convince another character that she really cares. Fake crying is distinguishable from real crying by the covert devilish grin seen over the other person's shoulder during the scene-ending reassuring hug.
Instead, Shannon just whines about how she thinks she was mean to the gate agent who wouldn't let them into first class. You're no longer interesting to me, Shannon. Boone, God's Friggin' Gift to Humanity seems to agree, because he tells her she's being worthless: "What do you want me to say? You're sitting on your ass staring at bodies." Shannon reminds Boone, God's Friggin' Gift to Humanity that she's just been through a trauma here, okay? He replies that they've all been through a trauma, but he doesn't know that SHE WASN'T TALKING ABOUT THE PLANE CRASH!!! SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT THE HORRIFIC RAPE SHE ENDURED IN AUSTRALIA, AND THE ABORTION SHE WAS FORCED TO HAVE AS A RESULT, AND NOW SHE THOUGHT SHE WAS SAFE, FINALLY, HEADING HOME TO HER FAMILY, WHO WILL NEVER HAVE TO KNOW HER SHAME, BUT NOW SHE'S TRAPPED ON AN ISLAND IN ADDITION TO HAVING BEEN RAPED AND HAVING HAD HER RAPE BABY ABORTED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Could be true! Who knows! She leaps to her feet and they start arguing; she claims that Boone, God's Friggin' Gift to Humanity has no idea what she's thinking. "Okay, Shannon, what are you thinking?" he asks, followed by a priceless shot of Shannon staring blankly back at him like a W in the headlights. You just know that somewhere in the Lost offices there's a gag reel consisting of that shot of Shannon overlaid with the sound of crickets.