Episode Report Card M. Giant: A+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Cold!
By M. Giant | Season 6 | Episode 5 | Aired on 06.21.2010
es her credit for opening up to him. "Even if there's a bunch of guys competing for her time, I need to be one of those guys," Frank interviews. Welcome to the herd, Frank.She's totally drunk when they rejoin everyone out there, and sees the one rose waiting. After some hammered babbling, she announces that Ty's getting the rose. Frank watches from the sidelines, his jealous eyes pinning Ty from just above the waterline like a waiting crocodile.
With that over, Kasey is talking about how either he or Justin is going home, and it's all down to his tattoo, and he's confident that Ali's going to see who Justin is and kick him out. Well, she may, but she's also going to see who Kasey is, and that's even worse for Kasey. Justin, in turn, is looking forward to the big showdown.
Ali is waiting by a helicopter, and here come Kasey and Justin. The latter totally upstages Kasey right off the bat with his two working legs and his new ability to hug Ali with both arms. Kasey bitches about how Justin is all about putting on a show. Unlike Kasey, who got that totally sincere tattoo.
The chopper takes off, and the altitude doesn't seem to prevent Kasey from jabbering. Ali's more excited about getting to see the erupting volcano from the helicopter than anything else, and with these two, who wouldn't be? Justin wishes he was the only one in the helicopter with Ali. I do, too; then the pilotless aircraft could plummet from the sky. Ali suggests getting closer, and they land on the adjacent peak. Kasey has to help Ali guide Justin to the edge for a closer look, but refrains from tossing him over. Justin says he wants Kasey to doubt himself, and compares it to a wrestling match, when you have your opponent on the ropes. And in the end, "You hold that championship belt -- in this case, Ali -- up in the air." Except professional wrestling isn't as fake as this.
After the ads, the helicopter takes them to a glacier. There's a little cave where the ice has been carved into the shape of a cocktail lounge for dwarfs. Ali and Justin find this impressive for some reason. Ali says this is her chance to get to know Justin, although she's aware that the other guys don't like him. They talk while Kasey chills outside, hoping that Justin's bad-mouthing him and making himself look bad. And coughing as he drinks something, which is always super cool. Justin is feeling good about the situation. And no, he's not saying anything about Kasey. Kasey's going to win this all by himself. For Justin, that is.
Ali joins Kasey outside, and interviews, "The only thing Kasey has to do today is be normal." Alas, he doesn't seem to be up to it. She starts talking about what they were talking about earlier, and Kasey picks this moment to start winding up to tell her about the tattoo, and finally shows it to her. "What? When?" she says, in shock. He points out the eleven studs signifying the eleven bachelors still in the competition at that time, and she looks up from the tattoo at his face, already shut down, already done with him, nodding and smiling and blinking like, I'm so glad there are cameras rolling right now, because even though he's about to hit me over the head and put me in a jar, at least my family will know what happened to me. She's trying really hard to be nice about it, but he doesn't know it's over. Still, does she really have to give a rose to one of them?
So now they walk out to the middle of the glacier so Ali can break the news to them about which of them is getting the rose. Her face totally disappears into her scarf for a while. Choose you, Ali! She finally gives Justin the rose and sends him on to wait for her at the helicopter so she can say goodbye to Kasey. Which she does, telling him that she feels bad, but he needs someone who can feel the way about Kasey that he feels about...well, some other woman, as long as it's not Ali. Then she gets in the chopper and they take off and leave him there. Awesome! Is he going to jump into the volcano now?
Ali's 100 percent positive she made the right choice for both herself and Kasey, but taking off and leaving him there, quote, "sucks," unquote. She adds that it made it hard to celebrate with Justin. Also, she doesn't like Justin either, so there's that. Meanwhile, down on the frozen landscape below, Kasey walks off into his own personal Jack London story. Justin congratulates himself and correctly says it was Kasey's own fault, which you'd think would make Justin seem more humble but somehow does just the opposite. He adds that there were two roses given: "One for Justin and one for Rated R." Coincidentally, what I shout at the TV in response to that is also rated R.
Pre-Rose Ceremony, the remaining eight bohunks (all in suits or dress shirts except for Kirk in his half of the matching sweater set, like, you have a rose, dude, don't look so desperate) talk about Kasey's elimination. Ali joins them and pays some lip service to Kasey before Frank steps up at the first opening -- which isn't even an opening, really -- and takes her upstairs for some one on one time. They talk about yesterday's group date, and she says she doesn't know who she'll end up with. "I do," Frank quips, and earns himself a hug. Then there's some making out, and Frank looks like he's about to cry, or having an allergy attack. That's what Ali was looking for. She'll probably end up ripping his heart out, but she wants to see it first.
Down below, Craig talks about being more nervous than he's ever been. But then he gets some alone time with Ali, and what does he talk about? How they haven't had much alone time. Then he moves on to talk about how he wanted to do something special for her, and starts unbuttoning his shirt cuff. Yes, he totally went there; he drew a tattoo on his arm to mock Kasey. Ali isn't too guilt-ridden about leaving Kasey to freeze to death in the wilderness to join in the mocking.
Chris N. totally face-plants, to the point where the guys down below can see that he's striking out, just from Ali's body language. It's so painful to watch you wonder how he got this far. I mean she asks him to open up, tell her some secret or guilty pleasure, and all he can come up with is "I like Mexican food." He hauls her into a hug, which she can't escape from fast enough.