Episode Report Card Couch Baron: A | 496 USERS: B YOU GRADE IT The Way We Were
By Couch Baron | Season 1 | Episode 17 | Aired on 2007.02.26
Chez Bennet. Sprague seems to hear something upstairs, and goes to check. When he's gone, Claire sneaks into the room where her mom and brother are tied up with duct tape. Jeez, Claire, after all the trouble you went to save her, you don't want to give your mom a heart attack here. Claire grabs a large knife and gets to work on the tape as her mom thanks God.
Upstairs, Sprague dramatically opens a door... to find Mr. Muggles. I'm telling you, he was just on the phone giving Linderman a good tongue-lashing.
Claire keeps cutting away.
Sprague enters Claire's room and discovers the deception.
Claire gets her mom and Lyle free. They all start to run for the front door, but Sprague appears and catches Claire. The other two head for the back door, but after telling Lyle to go, her mom turns back. Sprague has a glowing hand around Claire's throat, and her mom calls her name in desperation. But Sprague, seemingly sensing what's going to happen, takes his hand away all, "Ta daa!" Sure enough, Claire's burns heal before our eyes. Her mom gapes in shock, and who can blame her? I mean, healing the bullet wound to the gut was nothing compared to this!
Back from the break, we do a creepy sideways pan past some kids who are playing in front of the Bennet house. Inside, Sprague has learned his lesson, and is tying Claire and her mom up with so much duct tape that 3M executives are licking their lips in anticipation of a very good year. Claire tells her mom she should have run, but Mrs. Bennet grits that she could never leave her, especially after she just got her back. Okay, a mother's love and all that, but it's not like she could have helped the situation, so that's really kind of dumb, and Sprague's eye-roll agrees with me. Plus, what about poor Lyle, out there on the streets on his own? He could trip on some unfamiliar azaleas and break his little neck! Anyway, Sandra tells Claire that she always thought she was a miracle, but she never knew how much of one until now. This speech is going to start to get a little annoying, so I'll just get this out now: Awwww. Claire disagrees, and says she doesn't know if God made her this way, or someone else. Sprague has to pipe up that it wasn't God, but Sandra snaps that God makes us all the way we are, or at least He does until He realizes that He forgot to check with the programming execs. Sandra asks if Claire thinks Bennet really had her memory erased, and Claire snarls that she knows he did, and contemptuously adds that he said he was trying to protect them. Sandra says Bennet will come back, and that she has faith. "God gave you a second chance. Find it in your heart to give your father one." Okay, I'll admit that speech didn't drag on second viewing as much as I remembered. Still, I'm not sure how much they're doing for the concept of faith if they're relying on the woman whose brain is only slightly harder at this point than runny Brie to sell it.