Episode Report Card Couch Baron: B | 3 USERS: A YOU GRADE IT Love And Marriage
By Couch Baron | Season 1 | Episode 3 | Aired on 2007.08.02
We get a shot of a couple and their kid approaching the Draper door, and then inside, we see Betty pouring a liberal amount of the contents of a bottle of what we'll soon learn is bourbon into a small punch pitcher. I just hope the kids don't think it's Kool-Aid, or that playhouse is going to get awfully messy. She finishes up the preparation and is soon serving the guests mint juleps in proper traditional silver cups. Freely admitting that I'm not much for kids, I still think it's remarkable that these people are going to be parenting after knocking a few of these back. Betty tells the adults what's on the menu and apologizes that she was unable to get some clown for the party, who apparently booked an off-Broadway show. We get a quick look at Francine's husband, Carlton, and then some jerk "Chet" tells another spousal-abuse joke over his wife's objections, and I know this was a different time but I really think not only implying, but saying that you'd be psyched if your wife drowned is not really all that hilarious. I mean, I get that the show is continuing to emphasize people's below-the-surface resentment of marriage, but was 1960 too sophisticated for mother-in-law jokes? All this suburbia is too much for Don, so he heads out of the room with Carlton following him. Carlton notes from the house that Don must be doing well, and opines that they have it all. Don: "Yup, this is it!" And he means that, or his name isn't Don Draper.
In the kitchen, the women are having a little chat about their husbands and the unreasonable demands they place on their sons for the purpose of vicarious thrills. The doorbell then rings, and Betty goes to the front door to find Helen Bishop and her son Glen. Helen awkwardly apologizes, explaining that the door was ajar, and hands over a gift, apologizing again for the fact that she hasn't finished unpacking and hence could only find Christmas wrapping paper. Betty graciously says that as far as she's concerned, it should be Christmas all year 'round. She's being nice, so I suppose I'll have to forgive her for giving me the cold chills there.
Back in the living room, Don changes the station on the old-style upright radio, and we hear the announcer introduce Mozart's "Marriage Of Figaro." I think that's the most obscure person I've ever seen get the honor of the episode title in all my recapping days. Betty comes in and tells Don he needs to pick up the cake before introducing Helen and Glen. Don takes Glen to the backyard, and Betty and Helen exit as well. Soon after, Betty has a confab with Don, musing that she already told him about the cake before asking him to take some home movies of the party. Don heads upstairs, and then we see Betty introducing Helen to the ladies in the kitchen. We see Carlton kind of leering at a distance as she does so, and then the men make gross comments about her. There's also mention of the fact that she drives a Volkswagen, which seems like it should be a thematic tie-in, but is completely eluding me if it is. In the kitchen, the women are talking about Boca Raton as an Easter getaway, but Francine cautions them against the Jew factor. Betty reproves her, but Francine explains that she and Carlton went there on their honeymoon, and they were outnumbered. "It's uncomfortable." Maybe it would have been less so if you'd gone somewhere halfway...what's the word I'm looking for...romantic. Betty asks Helen where she went on her honeymoon, and then is all, "Awkward," but Helen easily tells her it's okay, and says she went to Paris, which was a great time even with her scum-sucking ex-husband. I'm paraphrasing slightly. The mention of the ex causes the fake smiles and catty eyes to come out, but Betty, good hostess that she is, tries to dispel the mood by saying that she went to Italy for a summer right after she graduated from Bryn Mawr. Francine isn't so easily deterred, though, saying that Helen must have loved Paris. "It's all walking." It's funny how these women are apparently equating walking with being a woman of ill repute. I think they're taking the word "streetwalker" a bit too literally. Helen explains that walking relaxes her and clears her mind. "I heard on the radio that Einstein did it." No one says, "If you love Einstein so much, why don't you marry him?" Which is an enormous missed opportunity.